Written by Jennifer Burgin

Life always has its ups and downs.  We will always be going through temptations and trials, (especially in our daily walk with God).  But isn’t it great to know that we can give all our troubles to God and let Him handle them for you, knowing that He will always be there and provide you with everything you would ever need in abundance?  Obviously, the answer would be yes, but some people may not always see it that way.  When life can get pretty painful and overwhelming at times, it can be easy to wonder and ask, “Why God?  Why is this happening?”  It might have you question your faith sometimes.  There may even be a time when you get so angry and confused with a situation, you want to turn away from God.  And that’s exactly what I did.  I renounced God and began thinking about going on a road to sin and a hardened heart.  I never fully succeeded with that plan thanks to a few people God placed in my life.

A few years ago on November 9th, I felt so confused and angry at God.  All I could feel was this very strong resentment and fury on the inside.  Just when I thought I was about to get closer to Him and grow stronger in my faith, that day just really took me by the storm.  I acted very childish by indulging in self-pity and threw a rebellious temper tantrum because I felt like God had shoved His purpose in my face only to snatch it from me and leave me in the dirt, despite prayer.  It made me question my worth and existence.  Whether God really loved me or not.  What I never realized was that during that season, God had actually been working in my heart and showing me where I truly was spiritually.  I saw things about myself I never imagined and they were ugly.  They led me to reevaluate my life and the motives I was carrying around.  It dawned on me that I didn’t fully understand what being a true committed Christ follower was.

I didn’t really grow up in a Christian home.  My dad’s very stale in his Christian faith and I don’t think my mom really cares for God.  God was rarely brought up in our home and we didn’t go to church.  In the 8th grade, I remember asking my dad about God and he decided it’d be best to talk to a buddy of his from work who’s a devout Christian.  The conversation lasted about an hour or two and I barely remember what was said that night….It’s sad, really.  I remember being asked if I wanted to pray to accept Jesus as my Savior towards the end and I prayed that as I got home since I was self-conscious about praying in front of people.  As I look back, I realized I didn’t see a significant change in me.  I had a desire to read the Bible and go to church, but they were very fleeting.  It seemed as if I was only playing a “Get Out Of Hell” Free card.  I had no commitment, if I did, it wasn’t obvious to me.  I was apathetic, lazy, living in isolation, selfish, and staying in my comfort zone.  It continued that way until I was introduced to the Navigators in college.  Nothing changed drastically the first year I was affiliated with them.  It felt more like a routine.  Bible study every Thursday at noon.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed going there for Bible study, fellowship, and of course pizza…hey, who doesn’t like pizza?  Well, fast forward to Summer and Fall of 2013, and I’m in a place where I hated myself and compared myself to others constantly.  I remember thinking why God created me the way I was and wondered if I really had a purpose.

Skip to November and I was suddenly filled with hope because things looked like they were falling into place as I tried to devote myself to prayer and read my Bible.  But then on November 9th, this “purpose” which I thought was coming true suddenly shattered in my face leaving sharp remnants of hopelessness, bitterness, pain, confusion, and anger.  They grew larger overtime to where I completely wanted to shut God out of my life.  I wanted someone to blame, so I blamed God.  I did my best to indulge in things that weren’t pleasing in God’s sight as a way to “get back” at Him and bandage my wounds.  The only thing that accomplished was more pain and misery.  Three months later, I’m fighting the urge to repent.  I continue to wrestle with God and for some reason, I returned to the Navs in January(despite efforts not to) and felt tremendous grief in my soul around February.  I reached a breaking point which led me to seek out two Nav leaders for emotional and spiritual guidance.  After a deep conversation with those two, I understood more of God’s love and was rescued from the rut I was in.

Since then, I’ve been trying to pursue Christ and live to honour Him.  I’ve noticed a significant desire for Jesus, spending time in the Word, and wanting to help others.  I wouldn’t have written this if not.  I’m not perfect, I still struggle in these areas.  It has been a real challenge throughout  because of constant setbacks, spiritual warfare, and my flesh.  But I’m glad because I know that trials are meant for our greater good.  Though the process is painful, it’s necessary in order to refine and shape us into the original masterpiece God intended us to be.

I really hope none of you are currently in a state where you’re not interested in Christ and His Word, prayer, being missional, serving, worshipping and having fellowship with other Christians for the glory of God.  And instead pursuing fleeting desires of this world.  If you are, I implore you; don’t take this path.  It won’t do you any good.  Just take a look at some examples in Exodus and Numbers.  Since the 9th of November all the way through mid-late February, I’ve tried to harden my heart but it was a constant battle with God.  No matter how many times (or how hard) I’ve tried, He just wouldn’t leave me alone.  And He’s definitely not going to sit idly by and let you do the same.

If you are going through a tough season right now, then just know that it’s only a test.  Once you pass the test, you’re going to see greater rewards at the end of the finish line.  So please don’t give up.  It may not seem like it now, but it will get better.  If you question whether God will come through for you, let me ask you: has God ever once in the Bible made a promise He didn’t keep?  If He says He’ll see you through, He WILL! (Psalm 33:4)  If you’re still having doubts, it’s a clear indicator that you’re ignorant of the Word or you’re upset with not having things go your way.  Life isn’t about you.  It’s about God and what He wants to accomplish through you, for His glory, not yours.  Things won’t always turn out the way you expect because God is the one in control. (Proverbs 16:9)  His ways surpasses ours. (Isaiah 55:8, Romans 11:33)  Look, that doesn’t mean God is indifferent towards you and your desires.  God really does care and only wants what’s best for you that aligns with His will and timing since His plans are perfect (Psalm 18:30), and His timing is just right.(Ecclesiastes 3:11)  Thus, I encourage you to draw closer to God and seek HIS desires instead of yours.  Trust me, you’ll be glad you did.  😉  You’ll still continue to face challenges, but how you respond to them will make a huge difference.  We all have choices and will continue to make them.  You can either choose to turn to God and accept His purpose in your life or choose to abandon Him and go your own separate way.

My hope for writing this is that it helps at least one person.  I hope something or maybe several things stood out to you to where you want to pursue Christ like never before.  If something did resonate and you were encouraged, then yay it was all worth it!  😀  And if not, then that’s okay!  I’m just thankful you took the time to read this.  🙂  If you’re stuck in a rut and can’t seem to break old habits or maybe you’re unsure of where you stand spiritually because your life hasn’t produced any fruit, my best advice is spend time in the Word and engage in dialogue with God, don’t be afraid of listening to what He says.  This will take practice, don’t expect perfection.  And make sure you’re not taking this journey alone.  That was one of my biggest mistakes.  Other Christians need what you bring to the table and vice versa so that the body of Christ can mature, be healthy, and complete.  My prayer for you is that you will continually seek Jesus and want to be a good imitator of Him.  And to keep pressing forward when you want to give up.

“Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble; for so an entrance will be supplied to you abundantly into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”-2 Peter 1:10-11

About Jennifer:

 

Jennifer is a twenty something year old imperfect sinner who constantly needs Jesus every minute and hour of the day.  She is currently in college about to finish her degree in basics before transferring to a University and obtain either a Psychology or Social Work degree.  Her hobbies are watching anime, reading manga, good books, playing basketball, dancing, exercising to K-pop music(or rather any music that has a good beat), listening and finding good, solid, biblical sermons, discovering new interests, and occasionally stumbling upon a good website or blog to read now and then.

“To some this world may seem like no place to bring up a child. And in some respects they are right. But we take that risk anyway with the comforting knowledge that it is not for this world that we prepare them.” (Karen L. Tornberg in The Best Things Ever Said About Parenting)

I’ve come back to this quote again and again during the 17 years my husband and I have been parents.

I look at the world around us and sometimes feel guilty for bringing our girls into it.

But this world is not their home. It is not our home.

This world is the place we can meet and know and learn to love the Keeper of our true home. 

It is a place we can disrupt with God’s grace.

My husband and I are far from being the wisest parents ever to be sent home from the hospital with a baby, a bill, a birth certificate, and best wishes for our utterly changed lives. But we’ve tried to feed our girls’ faith, and so we’ve learned a few things about what’s worked for us…and what might work for you, too, while you lead your children along the way home.

 

1. The priority of prayer. I know it reads like the default first entry on a list like this, but prayer is in this spot for a reason: it works.  In fact, nothing else on this list will actually end up working very well if prayer is absent.  For one thing, faith is what pleases God.  It makes Him happy.  And what is prayer but an active demonstration of faith?  Because if we don’t believe that God exists and that He can and will do something about what we’re praying for, then why are we praying in the first place?  Pray for your kids in the morning and at night and throughout the day.  It’s not about specific words…just do the thing.  Sometimes I simply say, “God, please help.”  Over and over and over. 

Are you wondering what good prayer does when God’s going to do what He’s going to do no matter what?  I’ve wondered, too.  I’ll turn to the inimitable C.S. Lewis to address that tricky bit: 

“Can we believe that God ever really modifies His action in response to the suggestions of men? For infinite wisdom does not need telling what is best, and infinite goodness needs no urging to do it. But neither does God need any of those things that are done by finite agents, whether living or inanimate. He could, if He chose, repair our bodies miraculously without food; or give us food without the aid of farmers, bakers and butchers; or knowledge without the aid of learned men; or convert the heathen without missionaries. Instead, He allows soils and weather and animals and the muscles, minds and wills of men to cooperate with the execution of His will…It is not really stranger that my prayers should affect the course of events than my other action should do so. They have not advised or changed God’s mind–that it, His overall purpose. But that purpose will be realized in different ways according to the actions, including the prayers, of His creatures.”

2. Music that matters. What goes into your child’s ears goes into their brain. And what goes into their brain goes into their heart. And what goes into their heart comes out of their mouth and hands and feet. (For more on this, check out “What Are You Listening To?” over on my much-neglected second blog, Sweet For Your Soul.)

Christian music has exploded since the days of Petra and Amy Grant (God bless and thank ’em).  There is something out there your child will like.  And even if they fight you and your “suggestions,” listen to good stuff yourself. Have it playing in the background of your life.  You never know what might stick.  Here are some of our family’s favourites for all ages:

• Anything by Go Fish.  Their motto is “music for kids that doesn’t drive parents crazy,” and it’s the real deal.  The first time I played one of their CDs in the van for my adolescent-aged girls, they both said immediately, “I want every one of these songs on my MP3 player.” (Yeah, this was a few years ago.)  But it’s music for moms and dads and toddlers, too.
• Hawk Nelson.  Get their Diamonds CD. Just get it.  (No, I am not being paid to say that.)
• Lauren Daigle.  Where to start?  Maybe here: Lauren’s weaving of Scripture and Biblical truth into song lyrics is awe-inspiring.  To say nothing of the fact that her music is just plain killer.
• Hillsong Young & Free.  Highly recommended by my tween.
• KB. Rap.  Hip-hop.  I’m not going to listen to him, but my girls love his “stuff” and tell me their guy friends do, too.
• Kristene DiMarco. Worship music, emphasis on the gorgeous.
• The Story. From creation to the second coming, this is the Bible set to music that somehow manages to capture the essence of the truth behind each individual story. Worth it just for Peter Furler-as-Daniel’s full-throttle scream at the end of “No Compromise.”

 

• Got younger kids who love sports? Try The One Year Sports Devotions For Kids. 
• Got tween girls? Check out The One Year Devos For Girls.
• Got a teen who’s attached to their phone? Download the YouVersion Bible App. 
• Got anyone with a pulse? Get your hands on Sally Lloyd Jones’ The Jesus Storybook Bible in any of its many forms and on Thoughts To Make Your Heart Sing, also by Lloyd-Jones.

4. Media with merit. I was late to the Facebook party because I have a very boring life and didn’t think people needed to know I was making macaroni and cheese for dinner.  But I jumped into the pool so I could create a group page for my Bible study sisters, and I haven’t looked back.  My initial reluctance about social media notwithstanding, I’m so thankful for connections my girls are able to have with Christian friends and with faith-building resources that go way beyond the flannel graph I grew up with.  (Because, old.) From websites to Christian mentors, there’s something to be said for someone who talks faith in your child’s language and is–no offence–not you.  Check out these field-tested, faith-feeding resources. (And by “field,” I mean “our house”.)

• What’s In The Bible? I grew up going to Sunday School every single week. I went to VBS and Christian summer camps and private Christian college. I’ve facilitated women’s Bible study for 10 years. And I am so grateful for every bit of it. But I learned more about the Bible from watching these DVDs than from all of the rest combined. Not because the rest is so bad but because this series is so good. Truthful teaching that’s high-quality, clever, and creative.
• Project Inspired. “Created for Christian girls to show how awesome God is.” My daughters are crazy about this website.
• Adam Cappa. He’s categorized on Facebook as a musician/band. But his Scripture quotes, dating advice, spot-on direction about seeking a mate, and other bits of wisdom for “ladies and gents” go way beyond music. 

 

5. Body building. I’m not talking about weight training. (Although, note to self: do more of it. You’re not getting any younger, honey.)  I’m talking about the way the body of Christ–your local church–can encourage, pray for, lead, guide, direct, and model truth about life with God. 

You can tell your son or daughter something about faith or God or the Bible a dozen times and get nothing more than “uh-huh,” only to have them hear it from a Sunday School teacher or youth group leader and come home talking about it like they’ve just had their own burning-bush moment.  Which is fabulous. 

My girls have been in church almost every Sunday since they were days old, and our branch of the body is crazy about them.  They pray for them and cheer them on and ask about their lives and generally show them what community in Christ looks like. 

I know intertwining your life with a local congregation is messy and tricky and often disappointing. It’s a lot like, you know, the rest of life.  But somewhere out there is a local church that is right for your family, where you and your children can teach and be taught, serve and be served, love and be loved.  Not a perfect church, but the right one for now.  Finding it will be worth it.

A bunch of years ago, when my youngest daughter was about four, she witnessed me mourning the demise of the cane seat in the chair I use at my computer.  The cane had simply worn out and broken through.  (I tried not to take it personally.)  My daughter heard me complaining about this sad development and drew me this picture:

Translated from her preschool phonics, she wrote: “I’m sorry about the seat. But that’s not the importantist thing, because God is.” 

There are lots of important things in my girls’ lives: our family, their friends, their education, their passions and pursuits. 

But feeding their faith helps us and them stay focused on the importantist thing. 

On what is eternal and true and on what, one day, will be home.

Until Next Time,
~Elizabeth Spencer

About Elizabeth: