Hello Dear UYM Friends, We are so blessed you’ve joined us today! Here’s a little video-blog from our President & Founder, Kerrington Sweeney! Have an amazing Sunday š
Until Next Time,
~The UYM Team
Category: Kerrington’s Posts
{Life} When the going, gets tough…
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
Have you ever experienced a moment in your life where you wonder, “What in the great world, is the Lord trying to teach me through this awful and tough situation?”
Well ladies, I am here to share with you that I have experienced one too many of those situations in my life time, but I am reminded that these are situations that I can now look back on and reflect. I am able to see how God has taught me some very valuable life lessons through these tough seasons.
Isaiah 55:8-9 says…
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
As I read and re-read this Scripture, I was left baffled every time. My thoughts nor my ways are not like the Lord’s? Well, that does make sense because I am a sinner saved by grace. But then I read the line “…my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
This gave me such an incredible amount of reassurance within my heart. God is higher than every thought, situation, season or battle that I am walking through. God has higher thoughts than I do. He has a plan for those moments where I question, “What in the world am I supposed to be learning through this God??” He is in the Heavens which is higher than the Earth, and through these times I question Him, truly He is to be praised. He is to be bowed down to because I can’t see the life-lesson He’s teaching me, but He has wonderful plans.
Ladies, let’s pray:
Dear Heavenly Father,
I thank You for today and for You uncovering this message from underneath some ‘stuff’ in my heart. I ask that these words would be sealed within the lives of these readers; that they would be able to understand that You are a BIG God and You’re higher than any season, situation, circumstance, or battle that they are facing. I pray that through these scriptures and encouragement, they would be reminded that YOU have unique plans for each and every one of them specifically. We pray this in Your precious and holy name, Jesus. Amen!
Until Next Time,
~Kerrington
The Brutally Honest Christmas Card.
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
This has been one of the hardest years of my life. I am still on a road of recovery from it. This past year:
In the early spring of this year, I was physically attacked by an unknown sickness. I was emotionally drained and spiritually on a desperate searching quest. In search for something to quench my never-ending thirst of strength in my physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. Resulting in, me spending a few horrific nights in the Emergency Room…waiting hours and hours in search of answers. That season was absolutely lifeless. No growth took place, rather the roots of a health filled life-style, were ripped out from underneath me.
I felt weary, defeated, and ragged. My soul was in pieces, scattered around, limp with no life left within me. Failure. Defeated. Worthless. These were the words so often spoken in my mind, on a vicious cycle that seemed to never end. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of mystical voices. I was numb to the Lordās presence. I had no emotional balance. I was knee-deep in a place of utter chaos and complete confusion. A season of wandering, searching, and questioning. A choice was placed in front of me. Would I begin to take up the quest in hope of finding my authentic purpose once again, or would I continue to lay limp, life-less in a state of exhaustion?
My weary soul felt no reason to pray. No reason to read my Bible and not even an ounce of reason to attend a church service. I was tired. Weak. Ready to, in all honesty, give up. āWhat was the point anymore?ā, I thought. This soul was mine. I, Kerrington, had to take ownership of it. No longer was I being a slave to the fears, raging inside of me. This was not my portion and I knew that I knew, something had to give.
It was the year full of hardship. Harsh words, temptations, and faithless defeat. Anxiety, unsettledness, sleepless nights, and never-ending tears. Oh, and change. Lots of it.
The year of goodbye to the old and hello to the new. A year of questioning what truly defined me. The year crammed with medical tests and procedures. Ugly moments and real jealousy. It was the year, I truly fell in love and then, got my heart recklessly broken. The year of frequently changing seasons. The year of learning to love and somewhat trust once again. Full of high mountain tops and low valleys of deep feelings and insecure emotions. The year of pursuing, a true balance for my life.
It was a year of realignment and of a complete shift that took place. A brand new purpose and an intimate calling was being birthed directly into my weary heart, into my very spirit. I would either embrace it with open arms, wholly surrendered or I would resist it, and be shaken to the very core of my being and be tested on my every move. God was calling my heart deeper through this year and I honestly was struggling to trust Him through it all.
But then friends, Jesus. He came…like a winter snow. He was quiet, soft and slow. Falling from the sky to the earth below.
I think at times I often forget, especially in the fast-paced culture we abide in, that God is a personal God. We forget that He deserves our undivided attention first and foremost. We just need to Stop. Seek. Pray. Reach and Regenerate. Because, He’s there.
He’s there in those moments when you could just break down and cry. He’s there celebrating with you in your greatest achievements. He’s there in the stormy crashing waves of life, and He’s there in those moments of sweet peace and stillness. He’s with you in hardship and in worship. In agony and in freedom. He’s always there.
Dear Readers, Friends and Family,
Whatever your year may have looked like…just know and believe that God has a purpose for it. The seasons, the circumstances and the situations you walked through have a greater purpose than you can even possibly begin to understand. Whether it was a battle year or a victory year, He was there. The battles you may be fighting or have fought, the hurts you are clenching on to, the bitterness that is building up within you, the struggles that are constantly bombarding your mind…Give them up.
Hand the keys over to God, let Him begin to lock those things out of your life. Let Him cleanse your weary heart. I know for a fact that He has prosperous plans for you. Hopefully this post has shown you that, I don’t have it all together. I live a real life, just like you. I am fighting battles, and am always learning to give more to God. I am just like you, walking on a journey to a Heavenly Place, our eternal home. I pray with all of my heart, that this vulnerably written post, has empowered you this Christmas Season.
God bless you and Merry Christmas!
Until Next Time…
President & Founder,
~Kerrington Sweeney
{The Diamond Movement} Day 1!
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
Ā I am NOT an object. Am I the only one feeling like this? Have you ever experienced a moment in your life, where you have felt like, you are just an object. Well, I have… Millions of women have suffered being told “Women are not people, women are objectsālook sexy or no one will love you.”
The medias bombarding screams of terrible lies at us women, are a constant obnoxious overload. Making us at times, feel inadequate about ourselves simply, as human beings. The use of the female body (which is so often digitally modified these days) is one that disgusts me to the point of distraught. It is broadcasted not as a fearfully and wonderfully made creation but, rather just a sex object.
The female body is way to often turned into a product. Sold, for male pleasure. It is turned into something to look at and to have those “feel good” moments. This has become the hideous normal in our culture. Objectification designates that ‘woman creatures’ have no rights. As if, our existence is oblivious. Turning any living creature into an object is an act of oppression. Objectifying women is not only to blame for just one specific culture or religion. Look at the media, objectification is happening in all cultures, religions and countries. We are being so strongly affected by what we see in the media that it starts translating into our everyday lives. Women are never portrayed as icons of worth, strength, and confidence.
The world portrays us women, as icons of being sexy, and of being a man’s pleasurable object. It’s a horrific global epidemic. Women of all ages, are thrust forcefully onto a never-ending search and quest to find true acceptance and a sense of worth in today’s corrupted society. “Why is my worth defined by my outward appearance?” After a short while, if not introduced to the truth. It is easy for us, to fall into believing that our only worth is in our outward appearance and we look at ourselves from the outside. For many women, it becomes a new cultivated life style. Every living moment is spent striving frivolously creating an outward appearance that will gain true acceptance and will be ‘worth’ desiring in the worldly standards.
This twisted mindset is placed as an attack from the enemy to completely destroy women’s confidence and self-worth. The way the world has treated us women has now affected the way we as women actually live. It has affected the way women see women. We no longer are equal in our sex. We are constantly on the look out. Her hair is so lushes. Her face is so clear of acne. Her body is so flawless. Why can’t I look like her??
These are just a few of the hundreds of comments I have heard in the community of young women. We are daily-blinded by how “Beautiful” is portrayed by the world. As a young woman, I have had moments where my appearance from the outside, gains this monumental importance, worth, value and attention from the opposite sex.
This attention was not sought but, rather forced onto me, as I innocently walked down the walk-way one spring afternoon with my young lady, Best-Friend. Hearing the horn honk, along with the loud whistles and non-sense shouts from the pick-up truck full of young men that recklessly drove by, were utterly unbearable. I walked away from that situation feeling violated, ashamed, dirty, and worthless. Why was this my fault? Why did I feel this way?
Proverbs 31:10 (MSG-Bible) says… “…Worth far more than Diamonds.” When I read this verse, I wept. I ‘Kerrington’ was worth more than diamonds??? How could that be? I for sure didn’t even feel worth a penny in those moments but, God seen me as a beautiful diamond.
A couple years back one of the wisest young women I personally know, spoke some very powerful words to us at a Youth Conference in an all girls session. I will never forget this analogy for all my life. She said: “Imagine if you had a big beautiful diamond ring, and you were walking along and then you accidentally dropped it in to the mud…Would you pick it up? Yes! Of course you would…Why?
Because it’s still a diamond. It’s still is valuable and worth something, even when it’s all muddy.” Ladies, we truly are that diamond ring in so many different aspects. We may have had a rough past in relationships, in life, etc. We may feel all “muddy” covered with sins and completely worthless but, God washes us clean…Because we are WORTH it! We are worth diamonds in His eyes!
Never forget…
You are beautiful.
You are valuable.
You are cherished.
You are mighty.
You are powerful.
You are pure.
You are worth it.
You are a diamond!
Until Next Time,
~Kerrington
{Life} Choose JOY!
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
Unguarded– Speaking carelessly without thinking about what you are saying. Very direct and honest especially when you should be cautious. Not protected or watched over. Vulnerable to attack, unprotected. Free from guile or wariness. Direct, incautious.Ā
Ā
Proverbs 15:1Ā
“A soft answer turns away wrath,
but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Ladies, we all have those days where we are stuck in a tangled web and we are caught off-guard in that one moment of attack. Someone can say something just slightly negativeĀ (Terribly rude in our minds)Ā and our first instinct is to snap back at them. I like to think of this situation kinda like a snapping turtle.
Like the Zoo-keeper always says, before entering into theĀ Snapping Turtles exhibit:Ā “She doesn’t snap,Ā unless provokedĀ or caught off guard, but when she is…Ā Then watch out!!!Ā Cause here she goes!”
Those are the moments where the Devil plots out a away to catch youĀ off-guard and provoke your spirit man.Ā One second you will be all cool,Ā calm, andĀ collected. Then the next, the Devil’s got you cornered andĀ you begin to reply in a not very graceful manner at all.Ā
We then begin to get sucked into this whirlpool of bitternessĀ andĀ un-forgiveness. As we are struggling to keep swimming against the current & are trying to choose JoyĀ and see the positive in this negative situation, the devil just continuesĀ to keep pulling down on us,Ā until our heads go underĀ and we drown into an off-guarded moment.Ā
In these moments it’s very easy,Ā (speaking even for myself)Ā To say things we will later regret. When we show bitterness orĀ un-forgiveness towards someone,Ā Our hearts then lose the special protectionĀ covering that God has placed over them andĀ we then take every slight negative comment, as huge ones.Ā Because our hearts are not being protected we instantly feel provoked,Ā and feel the need, to reply inĀ not-so-graceful manners to prove a point.Ā
~Colossians 4:6 saysĀ
“Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt,Ā
that ye may know how ye oughtĀ
to answer every man.
That is probably the absolute hardest scripture right there to live by.Ā
Speaking in every situation with graceĀ and a calm tone…Ā Definitely something, we ALL need to be working on!Ā Ā My mom always reminds my sistersĀ andĀ IĀ of this, often daily:Ā
“Are my words bringing peace to this situation or are they just fuelling a fire of anger??”Ā
Before you speak it, take a look at what you are about to say and ask yourself this quick questions:Ā “Is this glorifying to God?”,” Is his speaking with a tone of grace?” , “Is this bringing joy into that person’s life?”Ā If none of the above apply…then don’t say it.Ā (PlainĀ and Simple.)Ā
As I began to write this post,Ā IĀ started to examine my own heart,Ā God kind of gave me this little review film of the things that I have said verbally or even online to people in the past andĀ I began to weep.Ā I felt so ashamed, dirty even.Ā In that moment of shame,Ā Bitterness,Ā and un-forgiveness…I kneeled before God at 1:54amĀ and I rededicated my ‘mouth’ to the Lord.
With tears rolling down my cheeks I said: “God whatever flows from my mouth,Ā let it be glorifying to your name & let it always be with Grace. God help me to always choose Joy even in the ‘unguarded’ momentsĀ and Thank you for always loving me, even with my many mistakes.”Ā
I don’t know about you, butĀ Today IĀ am choosing JOY!
Until Next Time,
~Kerrington
{Faith} Take that step.Ā
Written by: Kerrington SweeneyĀ
It was true faith that broughtĀ Isaac into Abrahamās arms.Ā Faith, that kept Peter up when he walked upon the crashing waves.Ā Faith, that helped Moses lead the Israelites across the Red Sea.Ā Faith, that healed the blind manĀ Calling out to Jesus.Ā It was Faith that caused the walls ofĀ Jericho to tremble and fall.Ā Faith, that got Joseph through many years of waiting, in the deep dark dungeon.Ā It was Faith, that helpedĀ David through many years of hiding in the desert.
‘Faith’ is such a beautiful treasure.Ā
In Hebrews it is defined as ābeing sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not seeā.
Itās having great confidence that God will come through for us even when nothing in our whole life gives us reason to prove that He will.Ā
It’s faith, that we will see a better tomorrow, in this fallen world.Ā
Itās believing that He will answer your many prayers for a sweet little baby, just like He did for Sarah and Abraham, even after years without any answer.
Itās believing that when you are stuck at a dead end in life, like Joseph and your dreams are not even close to being remotely fulfilled, that He will still find a way out for you and a place for you to begin your next season of life.Ā Itās believing that when after years of struggling with your sickness and your pain like the blind man and the bleeding woman that with just a single touch from our mighty Heavenly Father, you will be instantly healed and completely whole again.
Itās believing that when you step off the rocky boat like Peter, out of your comfort zone onto the crashing waves and into the great unknown that He will be right there beside you, helping you take every single shaky step of the way.Ā
I have just recently really been learning and discovering that faith looks so different to everyone,Ā and sometimes having faith requires taking action, and other times faith means standing still and waiting.Ā
I like to think of Faith as if,Ā Itās like a motion door thatĀ wonāt open, until you start moving.Ā And in many cases I believe that is true.
Before Peter could walk onto the water, he first had to step out of the boat. A step in Faith.Ā Before, the lady with the bleeding issue could be healed, she first had to reach out to Jesus.Ā An act of Faith.Ā Before the walls of Jericho fell, Joshua and his men marched around it for seven days.Ā A sacrifice of Faith.Ā
In each one of these situations people have had to prove their faith by taking action, by being obedient to what God tells each of them to do, even if it meant being out of their comfort zones or doing something that made no sense.Ā
Though we may not march around Walmart until it’s walls come tumbling down, we still have tons of opportunities to test our faith and take action even in the culture we live in. Its the exact same for us…
We want great things to happen in our lives. We want to perform miracles in our everyday lives.Ā We want incredible testimonies of how God is working in our lives.Ā We want to fulfill these desires,Ā the visions, the dreams God has truly planted deep in our hearts.Butā¦ We don’t even have the guts to take that one step of Faith.
Today, are you ready to take that step in faith?!
Yes…it’s scary! Going against the trend of this world, isn’t always easy.Ā But together as a community of encouraging sisters I believe we each can take that step!
Dear Heavenly Father,Ā Whatever it may be in their lives…A rut, a dead end, a season of waiting, a time of chaos. Lord, we ask that you would help us todayĀ to take a step of Faith and give every situation to you. Whatever it may be, big or small! We give it to you. We are taking a step for our future in Faith, knowing that you will protect each of us in a unique way and give us the true desires of our hearts.Ā We pray this in your precious name, Jesus! Amen!
Until Next Time,
~KerringtonĀ
{Worth} Fully Redeemed.Ā
Written by: Kerrington Sweeney
Are you walking in your full redemption? Are you claiming this over your life on a daily basis?Ā
“In Him, we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace.” ~Ephesians 1:7Ā
The Battle you are fighting, it has already been won. The past struggles that are constantly haunting you, are taken forever.Ā The prisoner within you, has been released. The shackles holding you back, have been opened. The stained and tattered cloak you have been carrying, it’s taken. The heavy chains constantly clenching you, they have been broke. The curses spoken over you, are no longer there. The dreadful feelings of complete failure, are replaced with a bright light of hope.Ā
Daughters,Ā You are Loved. You are cherished. You are wanted. You are blessed. You are adopted. You are washed white as snow. You are worthy. You are ransomed. You are safe. You walk in purpose. You are not a mistake. You are treasured. You have a hope. You are a Daughter, held by the amazing creator of all things.Ā You are indeed, redeemed.Ā
When Jesus, was so cruelly crucified on that cross, He thought of You! With every strike of that whip and the blood pouring down His face and brows, He thought of you. When that crown of thorns was violently smashed into His skull, He thought of you. As the Nails, pierced through His hands and feet, He thought of you. He thought of you through it all.Ā He loved you, even in your darkest hour. Your most sinful nature, He loved you with an everlasting eternal love. He continues to Love on you, every single day of your Life.Ā
“I loved you, even at your darkest.” ~Romans 5:8Ā
Walking in full redemption, is a challenging task at times.Ā Your redemption is a whole free gift, set in front of you. Always ready to be received or it can just sit there and look nice all your life. Redemption is Free. Jesus payed the eternal ultimate price.Ā
“…in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”Ā Ā Ā ~Colossians 1:14Ā
In the Death of Christ, I live.Ā The light of the whole world, lives within you and I. Up from the dark grave, He rose again. He won the victory forever. No plan or curse set against us, could ever take us away from the Father’s eternal love.Ā
When you walk in your full redemption, You are given the authority, power, and favour to overcome anything! With God, all things are made possible šĀ
Until Next Time,Ā
~KerringtonĀ
{Life} Bitterness.Ā
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
Grudges, hurts, past relationships, un-forgiveness, and rude words maybe currently filling up your ‘spiritual life back-pack.’
This maybe even starting to be putting a strain on your relationship with God, with your family and even your friends…
It says in Proverbs 10:12-13,
“Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offences. On the lips of Him who has understanding wisdom is to be found but, a rod is for the back of him who lacks common sense.”
Bitterness, rips all wisdom from underneath you. Bitterness, starts to ‘eat’ away at your life…one grudge at a time.Ā The Lord today is challenging us to forgive and let go of all the bitterness and leave it at the foot of the cross.
We are to Love everyone (even our enemies) with an everlasting supply of unconditional love. Just like Christ loves us. We are to be wise in all situations where the feelings of bitterness may arise.
I leave you with a quote to ponder…
“The one who is wise seeks the good of others even hen she is the offended party.” -Author Unknown
So ladies, I can talk to you about letting go and moving on all day long…but if won’t even make a slight difference. You are in control of you. I challenge you, leave it all at the foot of the cross and begin to learn, to love with an everlasting supply of Christ’s Love!
Until Next Time,
~Kerrington
{Happily Ever After…} Seasons.
Written By: Kerrington Sweeney
At the beginning of this summer, I was asked to come share at a church in Wheatley about my Womenās Ministry. The original plan was, that I was to share for about 15-20 minutes. In, out and done. I was so thrilled to have this opportunity to share briefly in a church congregation setting. The night before I was to share, I received a call from the associate pastor of that church. He explained to me, the head pastor and himself had been discussing and had decided that it would be such a wonderful idea, to have me share the whole length of a sermon rather than my 15-20 minute, 6 page memorized rendition. I was to preach.
The words that the associate pastor had said on the phone that night truly struck deep within me. He said:
āWe feel that you are in a Season of readiness.ā
It was then in that very moment, that God began to reveal to me, the message I was to share today. Seasons, is defined by the Websterās Dictionary as: A time characterized by a particular circumstance or feature.
Our world frequently changes seasons. Seasons are so apart of our everyday lives. For example: Our weather is divided into seasons: Winter/Spring/Summer/Fall. Our calendar is divided into seasons BC and AD. Our time is divided into seasons, day light savings time, etc. The list could go on. Seasons can come yearly, monthly, bi-yearly, occasionally or sometimes just once. God created seasons for us to understand them and know about them fully. God has planned the seasons of our lives with infinite wisdom. He has ordained each one, knowing exactly what fruit is to be harvested during each time frame. Today, to start offā¦I am going to share about the Season of Life I am currently in and how I got here.
I joke with people all the time about, how I was homeschooled all my life, born into a passionately serving Christian family who loves God with everything, saved at a very young age, baptized and now walking into ministryā¦I didnāt really feel like I had a testimony to share. Because I never really had a āpastā or any mishaps in my relationship with Christ. It was tough going into this, with that mindset, thinking I didnāt even have a beneficial testimony.
Until, I truly sat down at the writing board and God began to show me what I was to share. So share I mustā¦Ever since I was a young girl, I have always loved the sight of relationships. I loved weddings, I loved everything about LOVE! I made it my ultimate life goalā¦to have the perfect dating relationship and Godly-marriage one day.
The pressure and high expectation of myself started as far back, as my junior kindergarten year. I was probably about 4 years old and for some odd reasonā¦I couldnāt understand the difference between the numbers, 3 and 4. My Mom and My Grandma, always tell me this story. Poor Kerrington stressing out to the point of tears saying: āHow am I going to plan my wedding, if I donāt know whatās 3 and whatās 4!?!ā My Mom, would remind in those moments of my wedding-bliss stress, that I would have plenty of time to learn my numbers, and to plan my dream wedding.
I was a 6 year old, with two favorite movies at the timeā¦father of the bride, and the wedding planner, watching them way to often and planning my dream wedding to a tee. From the wedding dress I was to wear, that I had concocted on some lined paper, with my gel pen collection, to the perfect, gorgeous wedding cake I had drawn in homeschool art class, to the simple wedding invitations (with a blank spot for the grooms name of courseā¦) that I had created on a now monster-sized computer, in the program, paint. I was ready for this dream of a wedding. Just waiting for my Prince Charming of a groom to be dropped into my Life.
āFor I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.ā ~Jeremiah 29:11
As I was getting older, and I began to have crush after crush through grade school and obviously nothing really became out of those crushes but, I wasnāt too sad about that thoughā¦because everyone knows, that you will always find your āone true loveā in your high school years. At least, thatās what I thought going into itā¦
In our home, my parents have made the very wise decision that, in order to be in a dating relationship we need to be 16 and older. Which is totally fair in my opinion and I look back at that now and thinkā¦Thank goodness, they had that rule in line because I was definitely not ready for the stresses and drama of a young teenage relationship.
I was now 14 years old and I had just been invited to my friends Hawaiian Style “Sweet 16.” I remember the day like it was just yesterday…it was a chilly April spring afternoon. This was my very first co ED party I was ever attending. I was so thrilled. Like I mentioned before, I was 14 years old and still in the process of ‘finding myself’ so to say. That evening before I was just about ready to leave for the party, my parents were in the process of ordering new cell phones. They were put on hold for what felt like forever (literally over 2 hours long…got to love customer service)
At this point the party had already began and I was getting very impatient to get going. I arrived only about 30 minutes late to the party but, still I was late!!! Upon my arrival, I walked in the back door of my friendās house and was greeted by a staircase landing filled with dozens of shoes. I could hear the voices of tons of people partying and loud music playing from inside. My heart began to pound.
I am at a BIG party and it’s going to be a late Friday night…this is amazing! I thought. With great anticipation, I opened the door and the party was already in full swing. I had noticed vaguely that there was some guests I did not know at this party but, I didn’t really pay much attention to it. Like any other teenage-birthday party we all visited, played games and ate snacks. But then…it was cake time! I remember making my way to the dining room where cake was to be served. Between getting up from my chair in the living room to making my way the short distance to the dining room, my attention in an instant was caught by a very handsome young man whom I had never met before in my entire life. My Friend, the āBirthday Girlā seen that I was intrigued. She quickly ran to my aid and introduced us. I was speechless. In that moment I could feel my tummy fluttering frantically with hundreds of butterflies. I mustered up all the courage within me to say āHello!ā
We chatted for quite some time that night and in amongst the crazy chaos and noise of the party for that 20 minutes or so it felt like it was just us there. No one else. Just him and I getting to know each other. The party went on and it was such a great night filled with so many memories. I remember leaving the party that night, with many hopes that one day I would see this young man again.
About a weeksā time had passed and I had given up any hope of really ever seeing him again. Besides I didnāt even know if he was a Christian or anything like that. I let the āfeelingsā I had go.Ā It was now the next Friday and I was off to youth group. All of us youth were just casually relaxing and chatting in the lobby of our church that night waiting for worship to get started. My back was faced towards the door. I heard the door open behind me and for some reason I turned around and long beholdā¦ there He was.
As time went on, we both began to have a crush on each other for about a year and a half between seeing each other at youth on Friday Nights and now at Church on Sunday mornings. I was so excited to finally turn 16, so I could just date this guy. Then Life happened, and reality struckā¦
I knew without a doubt, deep down in my heart, that this was not the guy, God had chosen for me. Experiencing a heart-break for the first time was very difficult. I felt so emptyā¦like I had nothing to offer. Like I wasnāt worth it. I came so close that time, to having that ultimate life goal fulfilled, with that perfect dating relationship and possibly filling that blank-space on my wedding invitations. But God had other plans for me. I moved on and began walking a different journey in my life.
Around that time, I joined a Book Study Club that my youth leaders, Mandy and Cindy, were hosting for the girls of our youth groupā¦and it so happened to be, that the book we began studying was āWhen God writes your Love story.ā Perfect timing, I know! I still remember the day that we ended our book study, and we had a time of reflection. It was then that, I rededicated this part of my life to God. May 30th, 2013ā¦I gave my Love-story to the Lord once again.
In that special God ordained-moment, right in Mandyās living roomā¦sitting with 6 other single young ladies, who also were patiently waiting for their prince charming. We prayed together. We prayed that we would praise God in the good times and weād praise Him in the tough times. We prayed that we would be patient for the right one to come into our lives and that we would trust God from that day forward with everything.
Over the past few years, I have witnessed the pure sight of excitement watching a lot of girls my age, begin sweet new relationshipsā¦
āWhen will my day ever come?!ā Was the question, I so frequently asked of myself? I struggled deeply with thoughts of, Are my standards too high? Should I be working out? Should I lose weight? Should I try and become less of a āchurch girlā? Should I get a new wardrobe? Should I be changing the way I live my life?
ā¦.Why am I still single!?!
God really began speaking to me clearly in those moments of distraught. I thought back and I couldnāt even believe myself for thinking those things that I had been. I was willing and ready to lower my standards, and completely alter my close relationship with God. I was ready and prepared to start changing my body image. I was ready to change my life, in sheer hope ofā¦āMaybe somebody will have me?ā
I felt so ashamed of my past thought life and on the spot I felt summoned to ask for Godās forgiveness. To clear my āLife Slateā of the filthy darkness that was covering it. In that season of my life, I truly learned many difficult lessons, on being genuinely happy for others. Even when they received something, I so desperately wanted, have waited for and have petitioned in prayer for. I was and am still very young but, the pressures of being single, in a relationship-obsessed world at times can overcome my heart.
The 4 out of 6 girls that had prayed for their Love-stories that day in our book club, are now dating some very incredible young men. I am still single and I can still get caught up questioning God. āWhy arenāt I one of those happy blessed girls with a young man by my side?ā
My yearning for a happily ever after, had begun getting in the way of living my life now, in the moment. I have felt inadequate that I truly didnāt have what it would take, to have the blessing of a relationship in my life.
About maybe 2 months ago, I was visiting some distant family members who I hadnāt seen in roughly 5-8 years. The very first question they asked me was: āSo are you married yet???ā My Grandma caught wind of the question that had just been asked of me, and she defensively replied with, āSheās only 17 years old…ā That family member then proceeded to say, āWell isnāt she ready yet?!ā It was in that momentā¦that I broke. In an instant, when those words were spoken, a gut-wrenching feeling came over me. I simply wanted to step back and weep. That pressure and high expectation was there, not only from myself, not only from the worldā¦but now also from my own blood relatives.
āA heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.ā ~Proverbs 14:30
The pressure and high expectation, only grows with time. Every girlās night sleepover, birthday parties, church services, homeschool outings and more, basically whenever I have come in contact with any human beingā¦the questions are asked of me:
Ā āAnyone special in your life?ā
Ā āDo you have a significant other YET??ā
Ā āYou dating anyone?ā
I felt like a complete failure, to be honestā¦Ā The feelings of worthlessness and not measuring-up have crept into my weary heart. Envy had taken over my body.
I was raging inside, each time a friend began a new relationship, got engaged or even married… it had to come to a stopā¦but HOW?!?! I was knee-deep into a dark pit of wanting and āif onlysā being shoved down more and more each passing day. I just couldnāt keep my focus anymore, I felt like I had nothing. Before the Lord I came buried, broken and defeated and in that moment of desperation He vividly spoke these words of love over my Lifeā¦
Ā āKerrington, your day will come.Ā In this continued season of waiting,Ā I want you to do nothing but, listen to me. Donāt ever change your standards or the way I have created you to be, just to get that significant other. I have created you unique on purpose the way you are, and I intend to keep you that way. You are my precious daughter, in whom I am well pleasedā¦Continue on this journey with me as your guide and you will bear much fruit in the near future. Come my daughter, and follow me.āĀ
God created each of us, with one sole purpose of knowing Him and making Him known. I personally wouldnāt have been able to get through this without God as my ultimate guide. He was my comforter, when I had nowhere to go, He was my lead, when I felt lost and wandering, and He was my Love, when I felt all alone. He was my Heavenly Father then, and He still is today, and He will be forevermore.
Instead of dreading each new day, wondering if every young man I see is āthe oneāā¦I can start living right now and choose to see the beauty in each and every day. Knowing that during this time, this current Season of my life, God is shaping me into the woman, He is calling me to be.
My singleness, is Godās perfect place to thrive in. I am no longer caught up believing ā¦that I need to wait for my āknight in shining armorā to truly start living my life. God has shattered my mindset with the knowledge thatā¦I can know the Lord fully and serve Him wholly right here, right now, with or without a young man by my side.
So my Testimony is one of, Godās graceā¦Coming from a girl impatiently waiting to date just any guy, to a young woman waiting with purpose for her future Godly Husband. My desire for my life is to be a reminder to the world that singleness does not mean you are āstuckā. The purpose I believe in my Season of singleness is to take every day and to glorify Jesus in everything I do. It is an opportunity to let my life, be a true living sacrifice for Christ.
Until Next Time,
~Kerrington
{Worth} The Dark Valley…
Written by: Kerrington Sweeney
Quite recently, I read a young girl’s status (whom I did not know) explaining her ‘self-cutting’ situation. She then went on to say that she was raised in a very poor, dark neighbourhood and had been raped more times than she could even remember.Ā She was beaten, bruised, and scared.Ā
She feltĀ unworthyĀ to live.
Ā
Ā
Because of her horrific situationĀ she was told by many doctors,Ā that she would never be able to bear children in her future.Ā
Ā The pain and sorrow that was on display was so real…so crushing.
Ā This girl, 16 years of age in theĀ Foster care system. Now just recently adopted into Canada,Ā
fromĀ a foreign country.
As I was reading this it hit my heart like a ton of bricks,Ā 16 years old…same age as me. Tears are now flooding my eyes.Ā As I looked at her life andĀ
then looked at my own.Ā My heart began to truly ache.Ā The things I daily complain about,Ā are the things she would so long to have; Loving parents, siblings…
AĀ happy family.Ā
Ā
Today, I am stepping back and being grateful for the many blessings I have.Ā
This letter is for you young girl who was so vulnerable and courageous to explain her situation, so that she could receive the support and encouragement she needed.Ā She may never see this,Ā but with the God I serve, all things are possible.Ā
Ā
Dear Young Girl,
Ā Whom is scared, beaten and bruised…
There is a God who see’s your pain and the hurts you hold on to.
He’s here to restore you and completelyĀ clean you free of the past.Ā
Psalm 51:7 says…“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.”Ā
Ā
Ā He will wash you as white as snow.Ā He is a healer who will heal all your wounds, he’s here for you in this low, dark valley…and he will be with you on the high glorious mountains of victory. He’s always with you.Ā I am praying andĀ thinking of you lots today.Ā I don’t even know you, but my heart is hurting for you and is very excitedĀ for your soon coming victory!Ā Though you may feel as if you will never see a ‘Victory’ in your life, because of your past…
Your victory declares The Lord is right around the corner!!Ā God hasĀ BIGĀ plans for your life!Ā Keep your head up šĀ
Ā
Until next time,Ā
Ā
~KerringtonĀ
Uniquely Yours Ministries 