Category: Guest-Writers

Written By: Sarah Travis

In 2008 Jason read a book on a bus from New York to D.C. called “When God Writes your Love Story,” by Eric and Leslie Ludy and by the time he stepped off the bus was praying for God to write his love story.  At that time I was a teacher in Scotland doing short-term missions in my summer breaks!

The Meeting

Love at first sight…?  Maybe second or third!

My first glance at Jason left me thinking he was rude…his first glance at me left him thinking I was a crazy woman driver blocking a driveway on a ranch in Tennessee!

His first words to me a few moments later, in the company of others, were jovial and enquiring…my first response was full of sass!

Despite thinking he was rude (he really wasn’t!) something stirred in my heart following the cowboy youth ministry volunteer meeting we were both attending and I knew I couldn’t let him leave without saying goodbye.  Our first conversation lasted 2 hours and ended with us exchanging phone numbers.  Upon arriving home, he told his mother he had met the woman he was going to marry and I had a similar conversation with my host family.

The next evening we spoke on the phone, mostly about our love for Hillsong worship music.  The following evening we went on our first date…and the rest, as they say, is history!

But it’s a love story…His-story.

The Courtship

Jason and I were both 31 when we met and, although we had both been in relationships and made our fair share of mistakes along the way, had never been married or had children.  Neither of us had a wishlist for a spouse but we certainly knew what we were not looking for!

I had been in the United States for a little over 8 months when we met and was due to return to my home country Scotland in just six short weeks.  The weekend prior to that early August evening when we met, we had both been away from our normal surroundings and had both had our own encounters with the Lord in which we had once and for all surrendered marriage to Him.

From the beginning of our relationship, it was different.  Christ was at the centre and most times we spent together were at one or other of our churches, home groups, or the ministry at which we had met.  We worshipped together.  We served together.  Two weeks that first meeting we sat in my host family’s home with our Bibles open, discussing marriage Scripture, and praying over the Lord’s leading for us to pursue His answer to one question…was this the one?

With my departure drawing ever closer, we continued to spend time together whenever possible, and by the time I boarded the plane to Scotland in September, Jason had flights booked to visit and meet my parents…actually stay in their home for a week — no pressure!!!

October brought him to visit me in Scotland and my parents to fall in love with him!  He immediately felt at ease as we all spent time together as if we had known each other for years.  Each day we ventured out to explore another part of my homeland.  On his last day, as we strolled along a street in St. Andrews hand-in-hand, I said to him…”Can you just leave your hand here with me?!” He replied: “No, but I am leaving part of my heart.”

The Engagement

I was able to visit the U.S. in November for a few weeks so in those early months we were not apart for long.  Although we had agreed not to say “I love you” until we knew if it was real love leading to marriage on that first evening when we sat with our Bibles open, love was growing deep in our hearts.  Each goodbye grew more painful and each time apart longer.  Apart for 2 months over Christmas and New Year, I was then able to visit him again in February which is when true love led us to profess our feelings and become engaged.

We would have married the next day if we could!!  However, there was the slight problem of me being Scottish.  We gathered together the requirements for the first stage of the immigration process over the next 2 days, then it was time for me to kiss my fiance and board a plane, unsure of when I would next see him.

The Foundations

Our engagement lasted as long as it took for my Fiance VISA to be approved, which was 9 months, and during that time we saw each other for 10 days.  Where our love story differs is that he wasn’t able to pick me up to whisk me away for romantic meals.  There were no walks, movie dates, or Sunday lunches with family.  The way our love grew deeper and deeper was through our communication.  We spent hours each week on the phone (thank you Magic Jack and Skype!), we wrote daily emails, and mailed cute cards.  We sang together on the phone, and discussed Scripture and the sermons we had each heard.

Our entire relationship during our engagement was based on two things — trust and communication.

Not being together was a test.  Temptations that never existed before presented themselves.  We were being tested from all angles but trusted each other’s faithfulness.  Not being together also removed the idle chit-chat, small talk aspect of being on a date.  We couldn’t discuss where we were, who we saw, what we were doing…we actually had to find topics of conversation daily for 9 months!!

Trust and Communication — the foundations upon which our relationship and our marriage is based.  Although I much prefer the years we have now been married and together almost every day, I give thanks for that time apart.  Those months laid a foundation so deep that when tried and tested, it has not faltered.  Our foundations have held us up as we have faced uncertainty, moves, and hardship in our short 3.5 years of marriage.  Our basis of trust allows me to submit to his leadership knowing it comes from a heart seeking the Lord’s will.  Our basis of communication allows us to have an open book and difficult conversations, speaking the truth with love and a sincere heart.

Let Love Lead

Trust and Communication — two of the foundational aspects of our relationship with the Lord.  We are called to trust in Him with everything.  We are called to let Him lead the way and guide our hearts.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not rely on your own understanding;
think about Him in all your ways,
and He will guide you on the right paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

We are called to communicate with Him at all times–in all things–always.
“pray without ceasing” 1 Thessalonians 5:17

I believe a marriage is it’s strongest when we let love lead.  “The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” 1 John 4:8.  When true love, God, is leading the way, we can trust in Him and so in His leading, as we submit our thoughts and feelings to Him, for it is He who determines the best path for us: “A man’s heart plans his way, but the LORD determines his steps.” Proverbs 16:9.

Let ‘God is Love’ Lead!

~Sarah

About Sarah:

Sarah Travis is from Scotland, but immigrated to the U.S. in 2013 to marry her husband, Jason.  She is an author, speaker, and inspirational Bible teacher passionate about helping women believe their acceptance and belonging in Christ, not in the world.

“The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.” Proverbs 16:9 ESV

You can follow Sarah on her blog, on Facebook, and on Twitter.

Written By: Patti Pierce

When I was a freshman in high school, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.  As a result I always knew I would marry someone who was a fellow believer.  But I was not in a hurry to marry.  In 1990 during my senior year of college, I met the man who would become my husband.  But at the time I first met him, I had no thoughts of marriage.  I wanted simply to have someone about my age to square dance with when my father and I went dancing.  However, God had other plans.

Dennis is everything I dreamed I would want in a husband.  He cherishes me, loves me and accepts me as I am.  He supports me in everything I attempt to do.  Truly, ours is a match made in heaven.  If it was not for divine intervention, I would have never met him.

In 1987, I started college at the University of North Carolina at Asheville.  At the same time, my parents moved from central North Carolina to eastern North Carolina.  I loved my school and the friends I made there.  Had I stayed there, I probably would have never met my husband.  But in 1989, I decided to change majors and change schools.  My parents encouraged me to transfer to East Carolina University because it had a good business school.  In 1990, I started my senior year and that November, my parents separated.  As a result of the separation, I stayed with my father and wound up going square dancing with him.  At one of the square dances, I met my future husband.

At the time I first met him, I was not “trying to find a husband”.  Instead, I just wanted to find someone to dance with sometimes.  But God had other plans.  I never pictured myself as a pastor’s wife, but God had other ideas.  My future husband informed me that he was called to be a Primitive Baptist preacher.  Several months after we were married, he was ordained.  I never pictured myself marrying someone who came from a tremendously large family, but I did.  Considering I was one of two and my parents were both only children and the only extended family I saw on a regular basis was my grandparents, this was quite a change.  My husband was one of five.  His parents are one of six and one of five respectively.  Plus, all of his grandparents come from families of around ten or more children.  This was quite a step out of my comfort zone.

Twenty-three years of marriage has shown, time and time again, how God’s hand has been on us throughout our courtship and marriage.  I can’t say we ever dated, because in the whole time we were getting to know one another we were always around Dennis’ family or friends.  When there are aunts and uncles by the dozens and cousins by the dozens along with a grandfather who watched over us, there is no real time to be alone.  Instead, we spent the time getting to know one another under the watchful eyes of those same people.  I knew they genuinely cared for my husband and by extension, they cared for me.

On the day of our wedding, one of the most poignant pictures our photographer (one of Dennis’ uncles) captured was during the reception.  It was then I first realized my father had never made it to our wedding.  Whether he chose deliberately not to come or whether he got lost on the way to the church, I don’t know.  But what I do know is at the moment I recognized what happened, my husband was there to comfort me.

Each major change we have made in our life, God has directed and blessed.  Certainly there have been times the road has not been easy, but we are committed to each other and our marriage.  God has blessed that commitment.  I can honestly say I married the love of my life as well as my best friend.  God was there at the beginning and I know He will be walking with us until the end.  He brought three amazing sons and one beautiful daughter into our lives in His timing who are a true blessing.  Dennis has been by my side and has never caused me to question his love or devotion to me.  So all in all, I can say ours is a marriage made in heaven.  I like to think that all of our grandparents are looking down on us smiling at what we have become.  Truly we are soulmates matched in heaven.

~Patti
About Patti:

My name is Patti Pierce and my husband and I have been married for over 23 years.  My husband has been an ordained Primitive Baptist preacher almost that entire time.  We are a Military Homeschooling Family who lives in North Central Pennsylvania.  We put our faith in the one true Sovereign God.  We have been on our homeschooling journey for over 10 years now.  We have four children – three sons ages 19, 17 and 15 along with a daughter who is 13.  I blog about our life as a family, as homeschoolers, and our faith which guides our daily lives.

My blogs are:

Truth and Grace Homeschool Academy
and
Truth and Grace Writing and Life Coaching

where I blog about the very beginning of journey to blog about my journey about being a writer and about working on my masters degree in Human Services with a concentration in Life Coaching.  I never dreamed this is where I would wind up, but this is where I find myself being led to go.

Written By: Tammy Fox

Our love story is one that spans almost 20 years but yet it seems somewhere between yesterday and forever.  I can remember clearly the first time I saw him in a crowded room as he passed by my table.  He was wearing a light brown suede jacket with patches from across the globe signalling a well travelled man.  In our military town that meant one thing to me and as I correctly guessed, he was a Navy boy.  I remember being smitten from the first sight of his dimpled smile.  But it wasn’t until several months later that we would actually have our first conversation.  I remember that night clearly as well.

We talked for hours as we sat in the cold November night in his baby blue 1987 Chevy S-10 pickup truck.  I remember that he smoked Marlboro cigarettes in the red pack and drank Mountain Dew like it was water.  I remember that he smelled like Eternity cologne and a hint of smoke.  I remember that the first night he kissed me at my door, it was soft and sweet and not at all what I had experienced before.  This one was different.  He wasn’t after the one thing most boys were looking for but seemed to genuinely enjoy talking and laughing with me.

From our first date he wanted to introduce me to those he was closest to, as if it were already somehow unspoken that we would share our lives together.  This tall, thin, somewhat awkward boy with the dimples and gorgeous blue eyes was full of secrets and hurt and rejection and even anger.  As his story unfolded and he opened up to me, sharing things he had never told anyone else, I knew that all I wanted to do in this world was to take his pain away and to love him.  It wasn’t all easy for him either.  I had plenty of expectations and my own baggage.  You could say we were beautifully broken from the beginning.

At one point very early in our relationship, we were at a difficult crossroads.  There was a moment that I could have walked away and went down an entirely different road.  I cried out to God for direction and I heard the Lord’s voice more clearly than I ever had at that point.  The Lord told me to love him…just love him…He would take care of the rest.  And that is what I did.  I loved him.  After only a few short months, Troy and I were engaged to be married.

The odds were stacked against us in many ways.  He was older, our backgrounds were very different, and it seemed that we had plenty of people who did not think we would make it and, well, to be honest there were times that we were not sure we would make it either.

The first few years were your typical newlywed years I suppose.  Financial issues, adjustments of living together, and within the first year, a difficult pregnancy.  Our first child, a baby girl, was born just shy of 18 months into our marriage.  She was the light of our lives.  The 24 hour light of our lives, as she was a smiling, happy child pretty much 24 hours a day.  She was a sleepless wonder, but she was the missing piece to the puzzle.  We were young and very much in love, but definitely wading through the first years half dazed, half asleep, and all the way uncertain of the things to come.

Three years later the next piece of the puzzle arrived.  He came into this world with a mess of dark hair that stood straight up on end and always looked like he rubbed a balloon across it to build static.  He had blue eyes and chubby cheeks and his timing could not have been better.  Little did we know the joy he would bring or just how much we would need him.

Several months later our world was rocked to the core.  It was a beautiful spring day, just after Mother’s Day in 2002.  The kind of day when the sun is shining and the sky is blue.  The grass was green and vibrant and the wind was blowing a gentle warm breeze.  The warmth of the spring sun warmed every part of me and filled me with the hope of spring, until I pulled into my driveway and saw my parent’s car there, unannounced and in the middle of the day.  I just knew.  I knew in the very centre of my soul that this was not a lighthearted visit.  A few moments later my intuition was confirmed as my daddy told me that he had lung cancer.

I can tell you how Troy literally picked me up off the floor after my parents left and held me until I could sob no more.  I can tell you how he was my rock that day.  I can tell you how I returned the favour when a few short hours later, Troy came home from work after losing his job.  Who does that happen to?  In the same day?  Well, it happened to us.  Book us a pity party, table for two please.

Ultimately, my dad lost his battle with cancer but joined the ranks of those who have gone before him to Heaven and Troy got another job.  We faced the challenges of helping my mother get back on her own two feet and we kept moving, one foot in front of the other.  Until, I couldn’t move anymore.

I went through a period near my thirties that I can only describe as the ultimate identity crisis.  I began to question everything about my life.  Who was I?  Who were these people in my life that were so dependent on me to be a better person than I felt like being at the time?  How did I get to this place in my life?  I rebelled and boy, that is a story for another day.  Let’s just say, it wasn’t pretty.  It almost cost me everything, including my marriage.  But once again, Troy picked me up off the floor and held me until I could sob no more.  That night something changed for us both.  It was a moment of pure honesty and intimate reflection on the status of our marriage and it was the beginning of the most beautiful part of our marriage for me.  God truly showed me what it meant to raise beauty from the ashes.

Several more years have passed and they have, for me, truly been some of the best years.  We are now in the midst of raising teens and getting ready to send one off to college.  We are caring for my elderly mother who lives next door to us.  We are busy working several jobs and still in debt.  We are fighting for our sanity, literally and figuratively.  Life is hard.  It’s full of well…life…complications and hard times but joy none the less.  Our love story is my favourite love story.  Not because it is ours, but because it is real.  Real life.  Twenty years of unfiltered, messy, beautiful real life.

~Tammy

About Tammy:

Tamara Fox is a 36 year old wife and mom from Chesapeake, Virginia.  She has been married to her husband for almost 19 years.  They have two children; a seventeen year old daughter and fourteen year old son.  Tamara has a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology and a Masters Degree in Professional Counselling from Liberty University.  She is a writer and blogger and hopes to continue to pursue her writing career.  Check her out own her own page at Fascinated Hearts Ministries on Facebook, Twitter, and on her blog Fascinated Hearts.

Written By: Jennifer Stohr

All of my life, from the time I was a tiny girl, I dreamed of the “prince” who I would one day marry.  He had to be strong and gentle and smart, and know how to cook and love books/hiking/travel/cats as much as I did.  It didn’t hurt if he were to be dashingly tall, dark and handsome either!  It’s funny how I never gave up on dreaming of my prince. During the last year of my first marriage, when I lost two women who (I falsely believed) were my best friends, I prayed for exactly what I wanted in a best friend.  I gave up on gender or looks but had a very specific list.

#1 – They had to love my kids as much as I do.  This was hands down the most important thing.  #2 – I had to feel safe leaving my kids with them.  #3 – They had to fully accept and learn about all of our allergies/asthma/celiac disease.  This one was also key!  #4 – They had to have ZERO connection with/knowledge of my soon to be ex.  #5 – I had to be TOTALLY free to be myself without judgment or condemnation.  Little did I know how well God would answer my prayers AND my childhood dreams!

The very first time that I laid eyes on Steve, I was overwhelmed by how heartbroken he looked.  I did not think that another human being could be as broken as I was.  I was not fooled by his ready smile and joking manner.  His eyes told the true story.  The second thing I noticed about Steve was his hands.  He has the most amazing hands.  They are beautiful!  His fingers are long and strong and big enough to make me feel safe without being too big.  Steve’s hands are soft and gentle, and I quickly learned how soothing and calming they are.  Just holding Steve’s hand gives me strength and fills me with calm.

Even though we met in September of 2010, Steve and I grew up in the same town, and he worked at the farm store that my father frequented, often with me at his side.  It would be fun to know just how many times we crossed each other’s path before God, in His infinite wisdom, took the blinders off.

When we met, I was starting my third year of driving a school bus for a small country school.  Steve was a brand new driver assigned to that school because one of the drivers had to retire with health issues.  Steve had never seen himself as a bus driver.  In fact, the day he got hired, he had gone to apply for an accounting job that didn’t pan out.  He decided to drive home a different way than usual, saw the “NOW HIRING BUS DRIVERS” sign, and just happened to stop in to check it out.  Due to having his CDL, he was hired immediately, assigned to the school, and told to ask me any questions that he had (many, since he’d never driven students before).

We quickly discovered that we were both in the midst of divorcing abusive partners, and that we both dealt with depression as a result.  During that year, Steve came to quite a few appointments with my domestic violence counsellor, first to learn how to keep me safe from my sociopathic soon-to-be ex-husband, and later to learn how the many years of severe abuse had affected me and how to help me heal from the sexual abuse and live with the PTSD.

We learned that even though Steve is “exactly ten years, one month, and one day” older than me (as he’s fond of saying), we are two halves of the same person.  We have VERY similar values, taste in music, likes and dislikes, activity level, food preferences, the importance we place on our faith, and many many others.  Finding Steve was like finding the missing piece of myself.  We just fit together.  When we went through premarital counselling at our church, our wonderful pastor told us that there was no question that God had brought us together, that He had made us just for each other, and that even though it had taken a while (I was 35 when we met, Steve was 45), our pasts had molded us into the exact people we needed each other to be.

Steve proposed to me under the waterfall in Tonti Canyon in Starved Rock State Park, just a year after we met.  It was perfect after all of the wonderful hours we had spent hiking the trails and learning about each other.  On Monday May 6th, 2013, we wed next to a creek, in the middle of the day, surrounded by those who love us most.  It was a beautiful but simple wedding, and it was everything we had both always dreamed of.  My kids have loved Steve from the moment they met him (they were 3, 5, &7) and were SO EXCITED when he asked for their permission to marry me.  They loved planning our wedding with us, and always say that it was one of their favourite days ever!

The last almost three years have been filled with trials, adventures, and most of all love!  We view each day that we get to spend together as a gift and an amazing blessing, never taking it or each other for granted or forgetting what God brought us out of when He put us together.  Yes, I AM living my fairytale!

About Jennifer:

Jen is married to her soul-mate Steve, and is a busy mom of three kids (13, 10, & 8), six cats, and one spoiled Boxer.  Jen is a bus driver for special needs students, a volunteer with Proverbs 31 Ministries as a small group study leader, and a full time allergy/asthma/celiac mom.  Jen loves to create new safe recipes for her family, cook, bake, sew, read, write, hike, & canoe with Steve and the kids, and travel with Steve.  She also enjoys playing Tone Chimes in church with Steve, attending Adult Sunday School classes, teaching her daughter’s VBS class each summer, and attending a local bible study.  Jen blogs at No Longer Invisible and Allergy Lane.

Written By: Rachael Dowling

“You don’t have to stick your head in the oven to know it’s hot.”

This was my philosophy on dating – and still my stance on life.  There’s so much we can learn through observation.  So much we can experience from being surrounded by family and friends.

My parents started homeschooling me in 6th grade – just as the years of middle school “puppy love” began.  I still attended the middle school for their orchestra program.  Even for the 45 minutes I was involved in class, there was enough drama to last me a week.

‘Kelly broke up with Ryan 2nd period, started dating Philip after lunch, and by 8th period realized Ryan was all she had ever wanted.’

Barf.  No thanks.  I quietly sidelined the dating scene, and that was just fine with me.  I never had a date to the middle school dances – or throughout the first few years of high school either – and I was okay with that.  Sweet 16 and never been kissed?  Oh yeah, that’s me.  Stories my mom told about not meeting my dad until college, gave me hope!  There was probably a man out there for me, I just had to be patient.

Dating wasn’t my goal.  My goal was to make myself an interesting, knowledgeable, and a God fearing woman – so when I did meet him, I would deserve him.  Attending church 2-3 times a week, personal bible study, watching Alton Brown, reading Phantom of the Opera, and attending ballet, photography, and orchestra classes were thrown onto my wheel of life.  It worked for Audrey Hepbrun in Sabrina, why wouldn’t it work for me?

One year, the local youth groups merged for a See You At The Pole rally.  The goal was to put on a Human Video (actions set to music) as a part of the pre-rally events.  I was cast as “The Friend”.  My role was to talk with a friend.  While we talked, a guy would come up and push me out of the way so he could make a move on her.  Ha!  Story of my life!  I got this…

Problem.  The guy was super cute!  GAHHHH!  Can I be re-cast?  The cute boy’s name was Joshua.  And for the first time, I asked my friends to find out some information about him. 

My friends and I started going to a larger youth group in the area.  Joshua was a regular, and I’d see him a few times a week.  We hung out in the same circle of friends.  This worked to my advantage – I could get to know him without getting too close.  I watched as he opened doors for me, and stayed to hold the door open for everyone else.  He was kindhearted and quiet, with a sense of humour.  

One of the things we have in common is our birthday week – his is November 14th and mine is November 17th.  The year we turned 16, my party fell on his birthday.  I couldn’t have a birthday party for myself on his birthday.  So, I asked him if he would have a double birthday party with me.  That weekend, we started dating.

My dad had set very strict guidelines about what “dating” meant.  No solo dates.  Special events like homecoming and prom were allowed.  But we had to arrive and leave with the group of 6+ people.  Even our talk time on the phone had a daily 15 minute limit.

Needless to say, we were excited to graduate high school and set our own guidelines.  But graduation brought even more distance.  Joshua went to school in Minneapolis MN, while I went to school Madison, WI.  Our freedom turned into 160 character text messages and waiting until 7:00pm when calling was free.  Joshua asked me to court him.  Even from a distance, it meant we were both committed to each other.

After a year of school, I felt convicted about why I was there.  I really felt God calling me to be a wife and a mother – and Wife101 wasn’t a course being offered.  Joshua also stepped back from school – it was difficult to justify costs and even more difficult to realize the inevitable day when those student loans would need to be repaid.

Joshua moved back to his hometown, and I stayed in Madison.  The end of fall, Joshua proposed and we set a date!  I moved back, and stayed with our Pastor and his wife before the wedding.  That spring, we were married in the same church we had first met – with our Pastor from youth group to perform the ceremony.  *cue happy tears*

Since then, our marriage has been filled with beautiful, happy moments… times of uncertainty…. unexplained loss… and the joy of new life!  Being able to bring our marriage to God has always been the common ground that keeps us together.

~ Rachel

 

Rachael Dowling has a passion for God, family, and photography.  She married her high school sweetheart, Joshua, and they live in the heart of Wisconsin.  Together they raise their four little men, and just started homeschooling this year.  On the weekends, you can find Rachael and Joshua photographing weddings.  During the day, Rachael loves listening to sermons – such as John MacArthur or Alistair Begg.  In her free time, she enjoys watching Dr. Who and re-runs of Good Eats.