Written By: Kendra Stamy
When a couple meets for the first time, they often say they had an instant attraction to one another. Not so in the case of Jason and I.
He had moved back to Ohio just 2 weeks previously for a job at the age of 20. I was 19 and disillusioned with life in general not believing I had any hope of breaking away from family sins, and even if I could, boys weren’t to be trusted.
I first saw him at a church youth gathering sitting next to a favorite cousin of mine and laughing as they prank texted some other guy. I remember wondering who that dorky looking guy was and then dismissing him entirely while talking with and enjoying time with my friends.
He really doesn’t even remember seeing me.
The next weekend at another youth gathering I saw a friend of mine and went to tell her hi. She introduced me to another girl who also became a great friend of mine. In the course of our chatting and getting to know each other she suddenly turned to the side a bit and introduced her cousin from out of state to me.
Jason. The dorky looking guy was Jason, my new friend’s cousin. We talked some that night, I found him funny and learned that he actually talked more than I!
Since he now lived pretty close, I saw him frequently and my “sister friend” Renae met him too of course. She picked on him and teased him a lot, leading me to believe she liked him. Consequently I would invite him along when when Renae and I were doing stuff, and she would invite him along just as frequently.
This continued for over 6 months and Jason also began coming down to the farm and helping out over the summer weekends becoming good friends with my brothers.
Then Renae began dating a guy from work. I asked her about Jason and she laughed saying he was crazy about me not her! ???
I stepped back a little from the friendship part and saw what apparently everyone but myself had seen all along! But I wasn’t sure I was interested.
Porn, unfaithfulness and tobacco use were common in the men of my family sadly enough. I didn’t trust men/boys and wasn’t sure I could.
But I liked Jason, he was smart and funny, he made me laugh and drove me just a little be crazy. So I began “testing” him.
At my request my brothers tried to interest him in porn and other such evils. My brothers and I were close even though they knew I disapproved and would actually do what I asked.
As well I would covertly and methodically go through his truck and belongings when he wasn’t around. I never found a lick of stuff that shouldn’t be in a young man’s possessions and when I asked my brothers about his response to porn they grumped saying he “preached at them” and told them it was trash!
Exactly a year after we first met we began dating. Through the huge upheaval and eventual reconciliation my family went through that year, he was always there.
Even when I tried to run away and even hurt myself he was there for me and was my steady.
Because of the issues in my family, and partially because I knew my own mind. We talked marriage from the start.
Little things like “do you want lots of kids” and bigger things like a man’s place vs woman’s place in the home. Since we were raised very opposite we also had discussions over homeschooling, alternative medicine and of course purity.
After nearly a year of dating he asked me to marry him. It was random and not at all romantic. It also took me by surprise. I sat there a minute before blurting out “yes, but not right now”!
He never asked me again, but 3 months later we sat a date and planned a wedding.
Our wedding, as all weddings go, went perfectly. The cake falling? Well that just happened and I remember laughing quite hard over that thing. My MIL made cakes for years and the first cake she ever “lost” ended up being her son’s!
Jason and I are not perfect, however we are perfectly imperfect for each other. If there is any lesson in our love story it would be this:
God makes beauty from ashes, and your darkest times often result in the greatest blessings.
Bio: Kendra is a Wife, Mommy, Homemaker and Blogger. She believes God should come first in all things, next her family and finally the rather unexpected ministry her blog has become online.
She writes at A Proverbs 31 Wife where her mission is “To Uplift, Inspire, and Encourage Wives and Homemakers”. Her tasty recipes are made with real, simple ingredients, and her money saving tips come from years of experience.