{Life} Pause.

Written By: Joceline Sweeney

I unfortunately haven’t heeded the advice I’m giving you today. I have learned the hard way of over piling my platter too full, that some days I could just scream, and sadly I often have.

We are all at different stages in our lives, but I know this post can be applied to you not matter what.

This is difficult for me to admit, but I hate saying no! I know I’m not the only one, as there are quite a few books available to help people like me and a few others who are willing to admit it! I would rather just say yes and a possibly grumble about it afterwards then to hurt someone’s feelings or to have them upset with me. I have done this for years! Take on something that was important, a worthy cause, a God thing and push myself literally past my physical and emotional limitations and then turn around and take it out on my family. Sad. When you are a kind and generous person you see needs everywhere and honestly sometimes feel it is your responsibility to fulfill them all.

I’m here to tell you… Pause.

I used to wear a crown of busy on my head, I still so often want to wear it, as it is like an old hat, easy to slip on. Wearing it to prove to myself and others I could handle it all with a smile on my face.

I sat down a few years ago and wrote a list of things that were on mine and my husband’s schedules and I was shocked and ashamed that I had let it get this bad. Seven pages single spaced of the things we were both currently involved in. I wanted to cry. No wonder why I felt completely overwhelmed all the time, like I could never catch up. I wish before I had let it get this out of control, I had taken the time to… Pause.

I sat and talked with my husband about what I had written and discovered, I began to cry as I didn’t know what to do. Everything that was on my platter was important, a worthy cause and even God things. He sat and listened to me as I poured my heart out, asking him how I could possibly go on living like this, being so completely overwhelmed and utterly miserable.

He asked such a simple question which stopped me in my tracks, “What do you want to do?”

I sat and thought about it for quite a few minutes, with such honesty I wept and answered “I just want to read a bedtime story to Jillianne!”

I knew then that I desperately needed to… Pause.

My heart was aching, being a wife and mom was all I had ever really wanted and I had let mine and other people’s expectations crowed out the very thing I felt I was created to be… a good wife and a loving mom, who read bedtime stories to her children.

I am a huge work in progress as I still like my sparkly crown… but now before I add anything else to my platter, I remember how much joy it brings me to grab a book and read to my youngest daughter.

When life and all its demand are coming at you, faster than you can handle, before you become overwhelmed…Pause.

Until Next Time,

~Joceline