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Guest-Writers

He Whispers

UYM

Written By: Kelly O’Dell Stanley

My friend Cindy and I stepped inside the empty chapel, lowering our voices as we did so. A wooden structure with lots of windows, this humble building perched on the lake. The empty room was decorated with hardwood floors and a view of trees and water. The only furniture: three benches, a chair and a desk. And on the desk, two leather journals.

I opened one, and tears blurred my vision. People who came here before me wrote their prayers on these pages. There was both childish handwriting and mature penmanship. Neat and sloppy. Short and long. Careful and scrawled.

But all were heartfelt.

Some penned cries to God to please hear them. One woman promised to forgive her husband. Others begged God to make Himself known. Some entries were signed “your prodigal son.” People talked of suicide, of loss, of loneliness. One teen wrote, “I’ve put off the old, but when will the new come?”

Desperation and gratitude filled the pages. A depth of feeling I could barely process, except by releasing a steady stream of tears.

I was standing on holy ground. This was a place where people met God.

And our God is a God who can handle all of these needs. Who loves each of those people and hears their cries.

Sanctified, holy ground.

Overwhelmed with His presence.

Bowed under the weight of God’s holiness.

I’ve never seen anything more beautiful. I flipped through the pages. Cindy and I read sentences out loud to each other, and smiled, and cried, and laughed, and prayed.

What a God, to inspire such devotion.

To motivate such surrender.

To cherish the depths of such raw emotion.

To answer the needs of people who are tired of hiding, who are desperate for answers, who will risk everything to hear from their God.

That moment is seared into my brain—really, into my heart.

Bet you wish you could go there. Here’s the truth: you can. Anywhere you are, when you drop the barriers and just get real with God—when you stop pretending you’re okay, when you face how badly you need help—that is holy ground.

Those are prayers that move God’s heart.

Those are words that He hears. Needs that He responds to.

Sometimes God has to shout to get our attention.

But other times—in these quiet moments, in these holy, sanctified times—God whispers.

He whispers just to you. Words for your ears only. Salve designed to heal your particular heart.

He whispers life, and hope, and light.

He whispers, “Thank you, my child, for coming home.”

~Kelly

kellyBio: Kelly O’Dell Stanley is a graphic designer who writes. (Or a writer who also designs?) Either way, when she found the place where the two intersected, she was exactly where she wanted to be. She’s a redhead who’s pretty good at controlling her temper, a believer in doing everything to excess, and a professional wrestler of doubt and faith. She’s been married for 25 years (making Tim a saint), and she loves her three quirky nearly-grown kids. Even if they do call her all the time. (Maybe especially because they call her all the time.) She lives in Crawfordsville, IN.www.kellyostanley.com.
Guest-Writers

Isaac: A Surprising Example of Faith

UYM

Written By: Debbie W. Wilson

If I were going to highlight faith, I wouldn’t have picked the incident of Isaac blessing Jacob. “By faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau in regard to their future” (Hebrews 11:20, NIV).

Do you remember the debacle of Isaac blessing Jacob? He thought he was blessing Esau!

God had told Rebekah, while the twins fought in her womb, that He had big plans for both sons. Both would become nations, but He’d chosen to pass on the blessing of Abraham to the younger one (Genesis 25:23).

Isaac didn’t agree with God’s choice. Esau was a hunter, and Isaac enjoyed eating game. Since Esau was born first, Isaac may have felt it was only right to give him the firstborn’s double blessing. Perhaps he reasoned, if God really wanted Jacob to inherit the blessing, He would have told me too, not just Rebekah. Whatever his excuse, Isaac wanted to bless Esau instead of Jacob and tried to behind Rebekah’s back.

But Rebekah overheard Isaac’s plan and devised her own scheme. She prepared a feast for Isaac and dressed her favorite son in Esau’s clothes to deliver it.

Blind Isaac grabbed Jacob to kiss him and smell him. The scent of Esau’s fabrics reassured him he had the right son. After savoring the tasty meal, he blessed Jacob with all he had in his heart to give Esau. Jacob scarcely escaped his father’s tent when Esau returned with the wild game he’d killed for Isaac.

Esau prepared his feast for his father and bounced into Isaac’s tent expectantly. Isaac “trembled violently” when he realized what had happened.

But the jolt woke Isaac’s faith. I believe the scene that followed demonstrates the faith the author of Hebrews wanted to highlight.

“I blessed him—and indeed he will be blessed!” (Genesis 27:33 NIV).

Instead of crying “Unfair” and demanding his pick receive the blessing, Isaac bowed to God’s choice. He demonstrated the obedience of faith.

Isaac’s words over his beloved Esau echoed what God had told Rebekah: the nation that would come from Jacob would be greater than the one that would come from Esau. Isaac finally believed God’s choice. Shortly afterwards, he blessed Jacob as Jacob before sending him off to find a wife (Genesis 28:1).

God blessed both Jacob and Esau during their lifetimes. But God changed Jacob’s name to Israel and fulfilled the blessing Isaac spoke over him on his descendants. Thousands of years later, we see what Isaac came to believe by faith: Jacob (Israel) was God’s chosen one for the lineage of Christ.

I said I wouldn’t have picked Isaac as an example of faith. But like Isaac, I’ve changed my mind. Isaac reminds us that faith is demonstrated through obedience. Faith supports God’s right to choose. He selects heirs to the promise and examples of faith. He defines right and wrong and what’s moral and immoral.

Sometimes God’s will goes against our natural inclinations. When we submit to His revealed will, we demonstrate faith that God knows best and discover new treasures.

Are you resisting God’s will in an area? Do you think you know better than God? It’s not too late to embrace His revealed will. Doing so landed Isaac in God’s hall of faith. What might it do for you?

~Debbie

Bio: Debbie W. Wilson is an ordinary woman who has experienced an extraordinary God. Drawing from her personal walk with Christ, twenty-four years as a Christian counselor, and decades as a Bible teacher, Debbie speaks and writes to help women discover relevant faith. She is the author of Little Women, Big God and Give Yourself a Break. She and her husband, Larry, founded Lighthouse Ministries in 1991. They, along with their two grown children and two standard poodles, enjoy calling North Carolina home. Share her journey to refreshing faith at her blog.

Guest-Writers, {Love}

{Love} My Story

UYM

Written By: Shannon Geurin

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My head was in his lap and I was looking up at the ceiling, wondering how I had gotten here. My little girl hopes and dreams were flashing right before my very eyes. My heart felt like it was literally being torn apart.  My husband’s soft hands were brushing away the hairs surrounding my face. “Shannon, do you really think that this is Gods will?” In that moment, that very tiny moment in time, it was like a lightbulb that had been flickering for days finally flashed all the way on and shined bright. “No,” I said. “No, it can’t be.”

HOW MY MARRIAGE SURVIVED WHEN IT HAD EVERY REASON TO FAIL.

 

John and I will be married 25 years in June.  This man I love with all of my heart, soul, and mind. He is my everything second only to Jesus. But after 15 years of marriage, I betrayed my husband such that it nearly wrecked and killed both of us. Nevertheless, what Satan meant for pure evil, God has turned in to something very beautiful.

We got married at 19 and 20 and boy did we have the world by the tail. 6 years later we were blessed by a beautiful big lipped baby girl that we named Alex Elizabeth. Then,  2 1/2 years after Averee Grace was born with eyes blue as the sky.

About a year after Averee was born, John’s best friend suddenly died and it completely rocked our world. He and John had plans. They were going to open a business together and had already done most of the research to get started. Our families were close. We spent vacations and holidays together. It was a very traumatic time not only for us, but of course their family as well. He had left a wife and 3 small children behind.

Fast forward 2 years and John had another best friend that suddenly died. Same situation. We were close and spent vacations together. He left a wife and two small children behind.

As crazy as this sounds, after this happened I knew that I would be next. I mean, why wouldn’t I be? John has a pretty extensive family history of heart disease. Surely he will die soon, and I too will be left to take care of two small children. How in the world was I going to do this? How will I get through it? Watching my two friends go through the loss of the loves of their lives just about did me in. It was extremely painful.  I don’t know how they did it. Seriously- I have no idea, because we grew apart. Sadly I am no longer close with these two ladies for really no other reason than we just grew apart. But maybe if I peeled the banana back a little more,  I intentionally pulled myself away from them. Distancing myself in order to try and save myself. Very selfish I know, but sometimes in life you do things that necessarily may not be the right things in order to survive.

So “knowing” that John would be next I started preparing myself and my heart. I started living out of fear and I just had to figure out a way to become independent. I needed to learn how to take care of myself and my two girls without leaning on John. This was a gradual process and it was something that just happened over time. I didn’t “set out” to become independent, it just happened. And it was wrong.   Aside from that, I had completely left my heavenly Father out.  I had forgotten to put my trust in Him. There were parts of me that I just hadn’t given over to Him. This was the beginning of my failure. Fear. I let fear in and allowed it to control my mind and thoughts.

Over the next several years we had our normal ups and downs as a couple. We had the normal struggles. We loved each other and were doing fine. We were “coasting.” When Alex was about 7 and Averee 5, John received a promotion at work which caused us to move to Dallas, Texas. We were excited and ready for this new adventure for our family.

Little did we realize that the bricks were slowly starting to break apart.  They were on the verge of crumbling down around us suffocating and crushing both of us almost to the point of death.

We were excited to move. Yeah, it was gonna be hard. All of our friends and family were in Oklahoma. Every thing we knew was in Oklahoma. We were tight with everyone- our family, our friends, our church. Even so we were ready. We felt it was God’s will and we were ready and prepared (or so I thought) for the adventure.

John had received a pretty significant promotion so he was in a season of proving himself at work. He has always been good at balancing work and home.  He’s always made family a priority and he does it so beautifully- it’s one of the things that I admire and love about him so much. So, during this season in his career it wasn’t that he really worked a lot, but he was under a lot of pressure. He was stressed out. He was on their radar and they were watching him. He just had a lot to prove.

The house we bought was an older home and so it needed some work. The master bathroom was a mess so we had to have it updated. It sounds like a simple task but honestly it was a lot of stress for me because I was the one over-seeing the project. Aside from that, I had to find new doctors, new dentists, new hair stylists – things you really don’t think about when you move, and it was just hard.

Do you remember how I let fear creep in? Fear had crept in to such a degree after the death of our friends that there was a part of me that I kept away from John…the most vulnerable part. I needed to be strong. I needed to be able to take care of myself. That fear flourished inside of me and taught me how to not need my husband.  That fear caused there to be a crack in the door of our marriage. And Satan slivered his way through.

Not too long after our move I opened the door of my heart to another man. This led to an emotional affair and then a physical affair that literally almost destroyed me and my husband and our two girls.

I’m going to stop right here and say to you- if you are flirting with this temptation STOP RIGHT NOW. It’s not worth it. I’m telling you, it’s NOT worth it! Furthermore, it’s NEVER God’s will to break up a family. NEVER. If you’re involved in a relationship like this than STOP. It is NEVER God’s will for you to leave your spouse to be with someone else. NEVER.

I betrayed my husband. The one who my soul has always loved.

The one who I promised to cherish and love all the days of my life.

The one who makes up half of my beautiful girls’ heart.

This beautiful man, I betrayed. When the affair came to light, my husband did not kick me out. He should have…but he didn’t. Instead he opened his arms to me. He showed me the love of Jesus. Don’t get me wrong…he didn’t just roll over. He’s a smart guy. He had no idea what I would do, and he had to be prepared. The morning after it came to light he got up (he was sleeping upstairs in the guest room), came downstairs and got in the shower as if he was going to work.

I knew he wasn’t going to work.

He was going to see an attorney. So, he left that morning. The girls were with my in-laws so I was alone. I remember just laying in my bed in the fetal position not knowing what was going to happen. I called my dad and I told him everything. I felt like I was a teenager again as I listened. “Shannon, you cut it off! Cut it off RIGHT NOW.” He had a conviction in his voice that I had never heard. He scolded me and told me what a mistake I had made. He spoke truth to me and talked sense to me. Yes, I felt like a teenager again…but it was exactly what I needed, because I certainly hadn’t been behaving like a responsible adult. Gosh- thank you so much Dad…for speaking truth to me. Thank you for not being afraid of the ramifications of how I would react. Thank you for being brave. You have showed me how to be brave. Oh how I love you Dad.

Can I just tell something?? Speak TRUTH to your loved ones! Speak truth to them even when it will hurt them. And on the flip side- YOU ALLOW OTHERS TO SPEAK TRUTH TO YOU.  Speaking truth to others can literally save them! They may not take it well at first, but THEY WILL GET OVER IT.

Later that day I saw Johns car drive in front of our house and pull into the driveway. I walked over to the garage door. I just wanted a hug. I wanted to be in his arms. See, we have this special hug thing that we do. We’ve done it our whole marriage. I walk into his chest and he envelopes his arms all the way around me as if he is shielding me. So, he walks in and I’m standing there. I walk right into his arms and he pulls me close. I whispered, “I love you John.”

“I love you too honey.” And at that moment we both knew that we were going to try.

Little did we know that this was one of the hardest decisions that we would ever make in our marriage.

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Here’s the cool part. On the way home John was praying and crying out to God. He asked God to help him know what to do. He asked God for a sign….and when he walks in the door there I am. Our hug was his sign.

Only God.

So the girls were staying with my in-laws and we had about 4 days just to really talk things out and try and move past the initial trauma.  Let me say- it would have been SO much easier for both of us just to give up. Infidelity is extremely painful and honestly sometimes it’s just too hard to come back from.  The world says it can’t be done.

But Jesus.. 

Giving up and getting a divorce would have been the easy part for us.

Instead of kicking me out John welcomed me in. He showed me love. I had mocked him and spit in his face. I caused him to bleed and I shamed him.  Sound familiar? Matthew 26:67 “Then they spit in his face and struck him with their fists. Others slapped him..”

Jesus.

He showed me who Jesus was and for the first time in my life I realized what Jesus Christ did for me on that cross. I’ve been a christian and loved Jesus ever since I was a little girl and at the age of 36 I finally understood. 1 Peter 3:18 – Christ suffered for our sins once for all time. He never sinned, but he died for sinners to bring us safely home to God. He suffered physical death, but he was raised to life in the spirit.

That cross though.

My head was in his lap and I was looking up at the ceiling, wondering how I had gotten here. My little girl hopes and dreams were flashing right before my very eyes. My heart felt like it was literally being torn apart.  My husband’s soft hands were brushing away the hairs surrounding my face. “Shannon, do you really think that this is Gods will?” In that moment, that very tiny moment in time, it was like a lightbulb that had been flickering for days finally flashed all the way on and shined bright. “No,” I said. “No, it can’t be.” I was so messed up. I had lost my mind..literally. I actually thought that it was God’s will for me to be with this other man.

I sat up and I asked him, “Why? Why are you treating me this way? Why haven’t you kicked me out?” He got up and started to walk around the sofa and stopped. He bowed over sobbing as if he was in deep pain and agony. He looked up at me, “Because I love you!- I love you Shannon?!”

I love you Shannon.

John, I love you too.

The days following didn’t get better. In fact, they got worse.

I’ll never forget the day we picked up our girls. I remember them piling out of the car; Alex’s mousey brown hair was just a mess and she had that crinkled up nose smile that she always gives me.  Averee’s sweet blue eyes just twinkled when she saw me. (Her eyes are now a warm chocolate brown but they were blue for the longest time.) They both ran up to me and hugged me so tight. We hugged for what seemed like the longest time. They had no clue. They had absolutely no clue what their momma and daddy was going through. Those sweet babies didn’t have a care in the world.

They had no idea that the next couple of years would be the hardest…that it would be an emotional roller coaster. They had no idea their parents were literally fighting the powers of darkness and hell.

So, we decided to make it work, but we were very, very broken. There was SO much to be repaired and so much work to be done. I had broken the heart of my husband and completely severed the relationship I had with many of my friends. How could I do such a thing? How could I? It wasn’t my character to do this. I was in such a state of depression for what I had done. There were many days that I didn’t know if I would make it. I just didn’t want to live in the shame and regret. It was too hard.

But Jesus..

Can I tell you something else? Never, EVER make this statement: “I would never do that.” You know, that saying… “Well, I would neeever…”   Oh Please. (Honestly that saying makes me want to throw up now.) I said it and look what happened. This thing….thing that I did was the NEVER of all never’s for me. It was my un-doing.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re wondering why in the hell world I would disclose something like this online or in public. It’s something that’s supposed to be kept a secret, right? It’s private. Yeah, I know. And Satan would love nothing more than for me to keep quiet.  God spoke very clearly to me and told me exactly what to do so I’m doing it. What we went through and how God restored us is just too much of a miracle to keep to myself. Honestly it’s His story, not mine.

JESUS.

Only Jesus.

 

RESTORATION:

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The next 3-4 years was the most difficult season for us. While we were fighting for our marriage we also each had our own, very personal things to work out.

John had to deal with trust issues and the hurt, anger and bitterness. I can’t really go in to what he went through because that is his story…but I will tell you, there were so many layers of deceit and hurt that it is purely a miracle he survived. He is a walking miracle. WE are a walking miracle. OUR KIDS- they are walking miracles.

Thank you Jesus.

And me? Well, I didn’t even know who I was anymore. I didn’t know how to read my bible. I remember picking it up and not even understanding the words. Sin does that to you- it twists you around and turns you into something that you are not.

Sin twists you and turns you into something that you are not. #MyInfidelityStory #marriage

Jesus was just foreign to me. It was as if I had never heard of Him or even read the bible. It was weird. The root issue was that I felt unworthy. I felt so unworthy and unlovable. I felt dirty and full of shame. There was absolutely no grace for me and no way back.  I would be forever marked as “that woman.”

The healing process for us was extremely crucial and important. Each step had to be taken very carefully. There were so many different layers to our situation. John was completely heartbroken at what I had done. Iwas heartbroken at what I had done. As I said before, our marriage needed healing, and we each needed individual healing. I don’t know how we would have done it without Jesus and counseling. We had an amazing marriage counselor.

Let’s go back and talk about sin for a moment. It makes you want to run. So you have two choices: either run away from God or run to God and let Him see you. And if I were to be honest, I would tell you that it’s easier to run because when you run you can avoid what you’ve done.  You can run but it won’t get you anywhere. In fact, it will make you miserable.

When we run to God it’s excruciating at first. Running to Him makes us see what we’ve done and causes us to face it. But letting him see us is crucial! My friend Suzie describes it perfectly.

“He peels away the superficial to find the source of the infection. Like a skilled surgeon, He cracks open the chest to find out which artery is leaking, or which primary muscle needs to be revived. The key to change is letting God see you completely, no holds barred, and offering your thoughts, your relationships, your life and your heart for His skilled touch. ..God sees beyond the obvious sin to heart of the issue -and then reveals that truth to us”

When I ran to God, that is when restoration started taking place.

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13  The key here is seeking Him with all of your heart. This goes a long with EVERY area of our lives my sweet friends. Every.Single.Area.

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Show Him your heart….he sees it anyway. So if He sees it anyway, than why do we need to show Him? Here’s why- it’s the act…and in the act of showing you will find Him and you will find freedom. And it will be worth it.

It’s so worth it.

If you will allow Him to see every part of you….every part…the good and the bad, than you will find him. And that’s just what I did. I found Him. The Him I never knew. Now hear me- I’ve been a Christ follower as long as I can remember. I have loved Him for as long as I remember, but after my infidelity and being stripped bare of everything I ever knew I was finally able to see who He really was and what He really did for me that agonizing day on the Cross.

That cross though.

Jesus paid the price for me that day on the cross. He carried the burden so that I would not have to. HE DID THE SAME FOR YOU. When I realized that I could stop carrying my sin around it was huge for me. He carried my sin to the cross!

Jesus loved me so much that he saw past my sin. John loved me so much that he eventually was able to see past my betrayal. It was Jesus in Him….otherwise he wouldn’t have been able to get past it. If you’re the victim in your marriage because of infidelity the ONLY way you will get through it is JESUS. He is the God of the impossible! SHOW him your heart! Cry out to Him! He will heal it– I PROMISE he will heal it if you let Him.

I have learned that with God I am capable of anything. He is my source! He is my strength! I am not only worthy of God’s love…I am worthy of my own love. I have had to learn how to love myself.  Please hear me- until you can fully love yourself, AND forgive yourself, you can not live in the fullness of what Christ offers. You are worthy and you are enough!

Until you can forgive yourself you can not live in the fullness of Christ.

It took me a long time to love myself. I know that there were some who judged me and shamed me…and that’s fine (actually..it’s NOT fine, not according to the bible anyway..)…but no one judged me or shamed me more than myself. Believe me- I judged and shamed myself enough for everyone. I didn’t understand why John treated me the way he treated me. He was extremely protective of me. When others shamed me, he fought for me. The one I betrayed fought for me. Anyone see a resemblance to Jesus here?

Jesus.

This is kind of a bold statement and please believe me when I say that I am speaking this in love and truth. You have absolutely no right to judge or shame me or another human being. No right. Other than Jesus Christ, my husband was the ultimate victim here. If ANYONE has the right, it’s him. There’s no grey area here. It’s black or white.

Someone once said to me, “Shannon, do you realize how lucky you are?” We had been talking about how far we (me and John) had come. This didn’t sit well with my spirit. It was as if this person was shaming me and they didn’t even realize it.  Honestly I don’t think this person had any clue as to what they were saying and I love this person with my whole heart and do not find fault with them..but it spoke volumes to me. I was looking down at the time and I slowly lifted my head with conviction and said, “Yes, I know how lucky I am….but you know what? John- he’s lucky too.” It made me feel so small and it made me mad. It was like this person was reminding me of what I had done, reminding me of the burden that I needed to carry around and that I should feel lucky that my husband didn’t kick me out. It was honestly a defining moment for me.

Because of Him I am worthy. And I am loved.

Learning to love myself was hard. Thankfully during the process of restoration I didn’t look to human beings to find love…I looked to Jesus. If I had looked to people I would have never found it, because no one can give us the love we need like Jesus Christ. John couldn’t give me the love I so desperately desired. Only Jesus could do that. I am confident in the love of my Savior. I am confident that I am HIS daughter. Daughter of the King. I can walk in to a public place and hold my head up high and know that I am worthy and that I am not dirty or worthless. I am loved.

Ya know, Christians are funny little humans. When one of our own sins we tend to just kind of freak out, don’t we? <insert total sarcasm here> I’m talking about BIG sins (infidelity, murder, stealing, etc)…because small sins (lying, judging, over-eating, pride, etc)  aren’t the same are they? When one of our own commits a BIG <inserted sarcasm still there> sin and then genuinely repents we find it hard to move past it. It’s like they don’t deserve to be happy and confident in Jesus. It’s like we expect them to carry around what they did. Why is that? I mean, whats up with that??

Can we as christians vow to not be that way anymore? Please? I used to be that way until I was the one, then when I was the one I stopped being that one.  (Say that real fast three times) Christians- (I say this in love) stop walking around like you have arrived. You have not. You will arrive when you walk through those majestic gates of Heaven. You will never reach this generation until you drop the pride. This generation won’t put up with it..they just won’t.Christians will never reach this generation until they drop the pride.

John 8:7– When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

Jesus was on my side, and He’s on your side too.

Luke 6:37– “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

Romans 2:1- “You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.”

Can we all learn something from this? Don’t judge. Love. I am SO thankful to the ones that loved me through it!

I learned the true love of a savior. He knew what I would do. He let me fall and it broke His heart, but He was right there to pick me up. He was always there. Through every single tear he was there. I swear I cried for 3 years straight. I was so weak, but I became strong because of Him! Everything I am today is because of Jesus Christ.

I want you to listen to me. 

If you who have suffered a broken heart for what ever reason,  offer that heart up to the one who died for you. Face your pain. Face your struggles. Strip yourself bear and offer everything you have up to your Savior who literally DIED for you. He died for you. He died the most hideous of all deaths. OFFER YOUR HEART IT UP TO HIM. Offer your broken heart up to the One who died for you. #Jesus

Maybe you’ve had a dream that has never came to fruition and you want to let go of it. Don’t let go!

Never let go.

Maybe you have sin in your heart right now or your like I was and you are carrying a past sin around…. you feel isolated, alone… Jesus isn’t afraid to talk about our sin!!! Talk to him about it! Give it to him! Give him your whole heart! Satan WANTS you to feel isolated and that’s a whole ‘nother blog post…but if he can get you to feel isolated than he’s got you!

So many people tell me that I am brave and courageous. Listen- Jesus made me brave!

No matter what we’ve been through or what we face, we all have within ourselves to be BRAVE – to be the person that God designed us to be! Its your decision! Step out of your comfort zone! With HIS courage and HIS strength we CAN make the choices that can CHANGE our circumstances!!!

WHERE WE ARE NOW:

 

So, has it been worth it? Naturally I guess it seems my answer would be yes. Our family is so happy today. There is pure, genuine and fierce love. We know what it feels like to almost lose love and we’ve both tasted death. We are thankful and we live each and every day out of gratefulness, and hopefully that has been passed down to our girls.  So to get to where we are today I would say yes it has been worth it…but if I could go back and change what I had done than I would. Because even though today we are happy I wish I hadn’t done it. I wish I could take it back and go to the place I was before I broke my husband’s heart into tiny little pieces.

Several months ago I got a call from a good friend.

“I would love for you to speak at our Women’s Conference this year.”

Those 13 little words caused my heart to hit the floor because I knew at some point that it would be coming and I was extremely nervous. Yet, God had been preparing my heart for this for the last year. I don’t know why I was anxious I just was. When I hung up the phone I inched down to the floor and stared straight ahead for what seemed the longest time. Ya know that one emoji with the big eyes and straight mouth? Yeah that was me.  “God…, this is it, isn’t it?”

Then I remembered; everything that I had gone though and everything that our family had gone through had brought us to that day. The day that I would share my story publicly. The day that would cause countless lives to be touched by my heavenly Father.

When my beautiful friend Jen asked me to speak she had no idea what was really going on in my mind. The self-doubt, the fear, the anguish. Would my family be okay? Why would I tell thousands of people about such a dirty secret? God? God! Is this really you??

I knew I had to do two things before I told her a definite yes. #1- It was critical that my husband be 100% on board and at peace with this. #2- I would need to have a conversation with my daughters.

My sweet daughters.

Their hearts.

This was almost too much to bear. After everything John and I had gone through; the utter heart-break, the depression, the isolation…nothing to me was worse than possibly causing my daughters’ heart to break in two for them knowing about what I had done. This is where FAITH comes in. It took an enormous amount of faith for me to move forward with what I believe God had called me to do. I had to believe that if he had called me to share my testimony publicly that he would put everything in to place perfectly.  This included taking care of my daughters’ hearts. Let me just tell you, he had their hearts in His enormous hands the whole time.

Before I go on, let’s backup just a little.

It took about 5 years for both of us to become completely whole. 5 years of blood and sweat. It was hard work. Marriage is hard work y’all. But if you push through the hard times it can be so rewarding.

When you push through the hard times, marriage can be so rewarding. #marriage #myinfidelitystory…

We only lived in Dallas for roughly 2- 2 1/2 years. John’s company was bought by a bigger, larger company so some things changed and it allowed us to move back to Oklahoma. Back home. It was a miracle. God knew what we needed- to be back home surrounded by family and loved ones. As I told you yesterday, the next couple of years proved to be the hardest. When we go through hard things in life we have two choices. Either we sweep it under the rug; because sweeping it under the rug will cause it to go away, or we do the hard part and face it. Remember Jeremiah 29:13?
You will seek me and find me when you seek me with ALL of your heart.

We could have swept it under the rug…acted like it was fine, but ultimately that probably would’ve been our downfall, and we would’ve chosen to live an average life, mediocre, okay, ordinary life. But we didn’t do that. We chose to face it. We had to face it. We longed for wholeness. We longed for genuine happiness. So we chose to face it. We had so much junk to work through. If you’re marriage has been rocked by infidelity than you know exactly what I’m talking about. In order for us to survive we had no choice.

We had to seek Him with ALL of our hearts, so that we would find Him, and in finding Him we would find our ultimate healing.

When you seek Him with all of your heart, your healing will begin. #MyInfidelityStory #marriage

We fought and we fought hard. And it made us strong. Jesus made is strong.

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So after Jen called and asked me to speak I talked to my husband and he was 100% at peace. He had no second thoughts. I kinda thought he might have second thoughts but he had none. Ok God? Wow! Well that was easy..so that was checked off my list.

Next. My girls. Oh dear God, my sweet girls…

When I talked to Alex it was the most beautiful moment and something I will forever treasure in our relationship. We went and got take out from Chipotle (her favorite place) and went to the park for a picnic. It is her senior year so I wanted to just talk to her about being an adult and tell her about the mistakes I had made in my early adulthood days that hopefully she could avoid. I knew this would also be a perfect time to tell her about what her dad and I had gone through. So after we talked about some of those things, I knew it was time to talk to her about the other.  “Honey, also….your momma made a mistake….” The moment I said the word mistake she bowed her head and put her face in her hands and started sobbing. I freaked out thinking OH MY GOD what have I done?? Was this a mistake??!!!

She looks up at me. “Mom, I already knew. I’ve known all along.

Wait. What? “I didn’t know if you were ever going to tell me. I’ve kept it inside for so long.”

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Wow.  I immediately started telling her how much I loved her daddy and what an amazing man he was and I started talking about love and forgiveness and I  asked her to forgive me. I mean I was grasping at straws here…

“Mom, I forgave you a long time ago.”

Those words. 8 words. Who knew 8 small words could change a life.

This little girl had kept that secret to herself for 7 years. She never spoke a word of it to anyone. Never asked me about it. Never asked John about it. Never talked to her sissy about it. Wow. What a girl. What a strong, courageous little girl.

We underestimate our children sometimes.

How did she know? Honestly I’m not sure. The only way she could’ve known is by hearing me and her dad talk. We had A LOT to talk about- especially after the initial trauma of the infidelity. We talked every night when they went to bed and any time we had a chance when we thought they weren’t listening. Alex is also very intuitive and picks up on things very quickly. She’s a smart one, that girl.

Galatians 6:7- …a man reaps what he sows.

I have reaped what I have sown in my precious oldest daughter. She carried that around for 7 years. If you know my Alex, than you know that she is very hard to get to know. She is sort of closed-off and it takes a lot for her to trust someone. She keeps her emotions bottled up and sometimes she finds it hard to express herself and how she is feeling. I believe this is because she had to learn to keep things in and keep her emotions at bay. My Alex is the most caring person you will ever meet. She truly cares about people even if her actions paint a different picture. Most won’t take the time to get to know her- but those that do find a loyal and caring friend.

We’ve always had a strong bond. I’ve had that with both of my girls. My love for them comes with a certain kind of fierceness. Since that conversation we have had an even stronger bond. It broke so many chains in her life as it did mine. She has a different kind of peace about her now…and I don’t know if she knows it, actually I take that back- I’m certain she does know..it’s the peace of the Father. A peace that ONLY comes from above. Her senior year isn’t what I had hoped it to be for her. In fact, it has been extremely hard for various other reasons. Yet, even so, she has peace. And she is happy. She’s always been happy…but she is a different kind of happy now.

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And here comes the miracle:

My sweet Alex- she knows how to fight. You see, we didn’t know that she knew. Over the last several years Alex has known what her parents went through…and she has seen us genuinely fight for one another. She was watching. I don’t know what she thought initially. Did she think we were going to make it? I don’t know? Did she wonder if one day she would come home from school only to find out her parents were getting a divorce? I don’t know? Each day though…she saw us fight for each other. She literally was witness to her parents putting the pieces of their marriage back together. She saw us love; the genuine, authentic kind of love. And she saw Him. She saw Jesus.

Only Jesus.

Can we just take a moment and give Him the honor he so deserves?? Thank you Lord!! Thank you so much!

And Averee Grace?

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Look at that sweet girl. Oh that little bundle of joy, what can I say about her? When I had my conversation with Averee she formed big crocodile tears in her eyes. She had questions. I answered. I was honest and real. Then 15 minutes later she was asking what we were having for dinner. Seriously if it were normal I would take a bite out of those cheeks of hers. If I could just fold her up and carry her in my pocket… Oh how I love that sweet baby of mine. She brings joy to everyone she touches. She has truly been a gift to me.

Can I tell you something? Be honest with your kids. Have honest conversations with them. Be real and authentic. Our world is full of fake, let it be different at home.

Let your home be a place of authenticity. #marriage #mystory #infidelity

Today our family is a living, breathing miracle. When I think of the grave possibilities that could have taken place had we not surrendered to Jesus I shutter. There is fierce love in our home. What you see is what you get with us. People joke and kid with me all the time about the way we love each other. “You and John are so sappy and mushy!” Yep. We sure are. I would always think to myself- if you only knew what we have gone through to get here. We hold on to each other and we hold on tight.

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We live.

We laugh.

We love.

John and I have learned the gift of God in marriage. We are a team. We love and we love hard. We don’t hide it. Love is a decision and we have decided to love on purpose. When I am weak, he is strong. When he is weak, I am strong.

Love is a decision and we have decided to love on purpose. #marriage #MyStory #infidelity

Because of Jesus.

We are John and Shannon. And we always will be.

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We have had so much favor in our life. John has had so much favor in his career. Since this happened he has received three promotions. I don’t tell you this to brag. He has had favor at work that you would not believe. I believe God has honored him for his decision to fight through the pain and work on our marriage. John has developed such a strength and tenacity that only comes from God. Oh how God has honored Him.

God will honor you when you do the hard things. #marriage #MyStoryofInfidelity

Proverbs 3: 3-4  Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart. Then you will find favor with both God and people, and you will earn a good reputation.

And me? Well if you knew me before and you know me now you probably will say I am a completely different Shannon, in a good way. I’ve come a long way. I am bold. I am strong. I will speak truth in love to you. I will support you and I will fight for you. I do all of this because of Jesus inside of me. It isn’t me, it’s Him. He is my reason!

I realized something yesterday as I was driving down the road and it made me giggle..so I changed my blog name to ShannonGeurin.com right? I think that’s been Gods plan ever since I started my blog, because.. well,..I am Shannon Geurin. That’s who I am. There is nothing for me to be ashamed of. I am the daughter of the the most high King and because of this my chin is up.  I am His.

Fiercely His.

xoshannonmeetshannon

Guest-Writers

What God Has For You Today

UYM

Written By: Bethany McIlrath

It’s a new day. What if it’s a good one?

God has a few things for his followers today (and everyday.) They’ll make whatever your schedule holds better. You don’t have to take them or appreciate them, but you can if you’d like. His offer is free and wide open.

Your options (and you don’t have to choose just one!):

 

  • Companionship

 

You never have to be alone. When Jesus said He was sending the Spirit to dwell in His followers, He meant it (John 14:26.) The Holy Spirit accompanies you, comforts you, and even advocates for you. The Spirit keeps you close to the Lord’s will and His best for you. That’s some companion!

 

  • Guidance

 

2 Timothy 3:16-17 says that God’s Word (at the ready for your reading pleasure today!) is able to guide you. It is God-breathed. He speaks to instruct you, direct you, correct you, and encourage you.

 

  • Wisdom

 

Is there ever a day you are not in need of wisdom? Today is no exception (1 John 5:20.) You need wisdom in your decisions, big and small. Wisdom should season your speech and change your attitude. Wisdom gives you understanding, which enables you to know Him. And knowing Him shapes who you are, how you see things, and how you live – all for the better.

 

  • Someone to Talk To

 

“Pray without ceasing” is as much a gift as a wise suggestion (1 Thessa 5:17.) The Lord hears it all and knows it all. He still loves you anyway. Since He’s always listening and loving, the Lord really is always there to talk to. Ask Him questions, ask for help, share your concerns. Share a laugh. The Lord is listening and He does respond.

 

  • Help

 

When God sent His son, He sent you help. In sending the Spirit, Jesus sent a helper for you. Yes, the Lord is ready to help. He is prepared, and capable (Luke 7:16.)

 

  • Love

 

1 John 4:16 proclaims that “we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love.” His very presence in your life shows His love for you, and you can choose to talk right up to Him today because of His love for you through Christ. You can go all day in that love and rely on it too.

 

  • Purpose

 

1 Corinthians 7:17 says that the Lord has assigned your situation. He has called you to a task, uniquely. All work is not vain when performed for the Lord. As you approach your tasks today, take it from Him: you have a purpose.

 

  • Growth

 

He has fashioned you, and continues to do so (2 Corinthians 5:5.) Today, the Lord has plans to shape you and grow you. You don’t have to be the same old, same old. You don’t have to stay stuck. Even as you wait on Him and nothing around you seems to change, He is growing you.

photoA learner at heart, Bethany McIlrath believes that listening to the Lord’s Word and being attentive to all that He teaches her through daily life is a priceless blessing. Eager to share about her Savior, you can find Bethany’s writing on her blog: Firstandsecondblog.wordpress.com. She would love to connect with you on Twitter or Facebook as well.  

 

Guest-Writers, {Beauty}

{Beauty} He Makes All Things Beautiful

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Written By: Patricia Underwood

As a nurse, we call them “frequent flyers”. It may sound disrespectful, but we honestly don’t mean to be. It’s a code term for a patient that frequently visits the facility. In the PACU (post-anesthesia care unit), I wouldn’t have thought this would be a common occurrence, because really~ who PLANS to have surgery frequently?! It wasn’t long into my field change in nursing from being a cardiac nurse of 13 years to PACU nursing that I quickly discovered a bizarre, yet tragically sad problem. An epidemic really.

Mental illness.

Sure, I had seen it in several “forms” multiple times throughout my years in nursing, but never to the degree as I’ve seen in the PACU. Without getting into too many potentially disturbing details, some people have such a difficult time coping with life that they harm themselves to the point that requires surgery. They are usually very open and honest about their reasons, once asked. I can’t pretend to understand exactly what they have gone through or what they are dealing with in their hearts or heads that leads them to thinking THAT is the only “answer” to somehow lessening the internal pain they are experiencing.

But, the sad truth is, for various reasons, it’s been my experience that most nurses find caring for these patients after surgery is extremely challenging. I would even go as far to say that many nurses dread the post-operative period with the patient. I believe it mostly has to do with the nurse’s own insecurity with how to approach and communicate with the patient. A lot of these patients are being treated for at least a couple different mental illnesses, so their behavior and attitudes could be affected by their medications, complicating the entire experience.

Matthew 25:40 (NLT)
“And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’

It would be fair to say that of all the patients to care for in the recovery room, a patient with mental illness (especially one that self-harms to this extent) would be the “least of these”. He/she would be like the leper that is forbidden from coming into the crowd of people. They’d be the one that the disciples would advise Jesus to ignore.

Yet, Jesus sees the Beautiful inside. 
He sees their heart.

1 Samuel 16:7 (NLT)
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

I believe a huge part of what patient’s with mental illness feel is a total loss of self-control. And can I just be honest here?! Haven’t we all felt that to one degree or another? I can’t say that I have always reacted the best in those situations myself. I may not have decided to self-harm, but indirectly, I’m sure the ways I “handled” those times in my life weren’t always the healthiest.

I once had such “frequent flyer” patient with mental illness. I remembered him clearly from the last time he had surgery. After he woke up from his last surgery, he became confused and combative during the post-operative period. He actually physically assaulted one of our male nurses and sent that nurse to the emergency room to be evaluated for a broken jaw! Several months passed and the patient was back for a similar surgery. This time, I was going to be his nurse in the recovery room. I prayed for God’s protection as this young man woke up from surgery and prayed that God would give me a calm demeanor for this man.

Not only did his post-operative period go perfectly, but God softened this young man’s heart and caused him to open up to me and share with me a beautiful piece of it that I believe he hasn’t shared with very many other people. This young man writes song lyrics! He keeps a journal of all the lyrics he’s ever written and had it with him. He mentioned it and I was immediately intrigued. Perhaps because I showed interest (maybe one of the first people to ever show genuine interest) he chose to share it with me.

I opened his simple 49-cent journal to see pages upon pages upon pages of lyrics, written in the most beautiful handwriting. It was obvious that such pride was taken when he wrote each line.

As I was flipping through his lyric journal, I felt like I was taking glimpses into his heart. I didn’t want to read the words because I felt like that was something too private, but I told him that I thought he had an amazing gift and I hope he continues to write!! I love how God uses even something that the world sees as “ugly” and can completely use and transform it into something so beautiful!! I pray this young man will be able to see God’s handiwork in his life (Ephesians 2:10 NIV) and see that He has been working all things for his good (Romans 8:28).

It was a privilege to care for this gentle soul that day. God reminded me that patients are more than their diagnosis and that they all need tender, loving care in their most vulnerable times of pain~ which often times is deeper than the physical level.

Until Next Time,
 Tricia 

 

Guest-Writers

Taking Captive

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Written By: Dana Hoebek

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Many Christians have read this verse. Most have no idea exactly how to do it. It seems like something we should do, seems important.

This article is written with the born again believer in mind. One who has accepted Christ as their Savior and is indwelt with the Holy Spirit. That is the only way this will work, is through the power of the Holy Spirit.

The battle field of every human is the mind. It is where you become more like your surroundings and circumstances or more like Christ. It is where pride and self-sufficiency happen or surrender happens. It’s where you decide if you are going to live as who you are in Christ or how you and the world think you should live. You either have a defense built toward Satan and the influences of this world or you do not. Scripture says our battle is not against flesh and blood but against the Spiritual powers of this world.

This verse is revolutionary, especially in today’s world of self-centeredness. Through a heart- wrenching, life changing experience I have learned just exactly how important this verse is. There is a way to do this and based on the circumstances you are in, there are steps to success.

This verse is literally an instruction that will change the course of your life. I am talking big things like, never gossiping again, never picking up a drink for the alcoholic, staying sexually pure for those struggling with lust or impure relationships, not being cold-hearted and mean in your speech, stop swearing, and, in my estimation, a huge one- overcoming emotional trauma from abuse.

I’m going to list the ways I have learned to use this verse as both a guide post, reminder and support system. I will tell you up front, this is not a “one and done” type of thing. It is daily choosing Christ, putting on the full armor of God according to Ephesians 6:10-18. You have to be diligent and look to the future where Christ gets the victory and you are free!

 

  • What it means– Any sinful thing, thoughts or otherwise that sets itself up against the Lord your God. Scripture is full of verses and descriptions of what sin is. If you are a believer and the Holy Spirit resides in you, He will tell you when it’s sin, you need to listen and heed the warning. To take captive the thought is to literally put it into bondage. It doesn’t get to rule, reign and wreak havoc. It doesn’t get to set up house and live in your head. It doesn’t get any control whatsoever. You are in charge of your thoughts and you are responsible for them and what you do with them.
  • Recognition and Repentance- When you’ve been involved in something sinful, been abused, or have some sort of an addiction that won’t leave you alone, your thought life can be a nightmare. You can feel like you’ll never be freed from it. You’ve got to recognize what the thoughts are and where they lead you, take charge before they start to control you. Repentance comes when you’ve turned away from sin and do not want to do it any longer. Changing your thought life is exactly that, turning away from something old and changing it to something new.
  • The Power in His Name- There is no way to do this without the power of Jesus. He’s the creator and sustainer of this earth and He created your mind, He has the power to change it. Your job is surrender. Believe me, I know it’s not easy and it doesn’t feel good to give up control- coming from a formerly enslaved control-freak. Did you see that first part “formerly”? I can tell you how to do this with some authority of experience because what I have had to walk through to find freedom is no small task and I am here to tell you it’s possible. When my thoughts would overtake me, crash down on me like a tidal wave, I knew in my heart I had to cry out to Jesus for deliverance. It came small and weak at first, but I was open to surrender because I had no other way, nothing else worked. As I practiced day in and day out, sometimes several times an hour, I began to watch the miracle work. I’d say “Lord Jesus, I don’t want these thoughts, I want to have the mind of Christ. I refuse to let them take charge over me, Lord please change my mind. Help me to think new thoughts, I give this to You and ask You to change me”. Sometimes it was more of a short plea “God I can’t do this, I need you to do this for me”. One thing I can tell you for certain, He hears your cry and comes to your aid. It is completely in God’s will for your mind to be transformed to be like Christ and when you ask that of Him, He’s all over it, no doubt about it!
  • Do Not Give Up- Honestly, it’s tiresome. Some days I just want to be done and give up, Christ reminds me of how far we’ve come together and that he going to finish the work He started in me. What you will learn is true daily dependence on God. The issue you’ve got is that Satan has had a heyday putting up His wall paper of lies in your head. Your feelings of worthlessness, guilt and shame, hatred towards someone, desire for justice without mercy instead of love, selfishness with your time, talents or treasures, the overwhelming desire to talk about someone behind their back, to justify your bad behavior, make up lies or excuses, shift blame, lust after someone in your head and justify it by not telling anyone or blaming your circumstances, feeling entitled to your feelings no matter what they are because someone caused you to feel that way. ALL of those things and many more are things Satan plays with in your head. I’m telling you in all earnest, if you allow any of those to marinate in your head and you give them any time to ruminate around, you will have a terrible time being successful. This can create a foothold for Satan in your mind. If it stays there and you allow it to remain, Satan will always come back to that area and harass you with it. You have to be diligent to remind yourself you are changing and God’s doing a work in you. Take that thought captive, don’t let it go any further.
  • What to do instead- Once you begin to take the thought captive and turn it over to God, you begin tearing down the wall paper Satan has put up. You’ve got to put up the wall paper of God’s Word in place of it or Satan will come back with a vengeance to take back what he lost. All that time you spent in those thoughts, whatever your circumstances may be, you now have to spend time reading God’s Word and becoming familiar with it enough to use it in time of need. 2 Timothy 3:16 says that “All Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching and reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.”  You’ve got to read and find verses that help you through your circumstances and that replace the old sinful thoughts that lead to sinful behavior.
  • Reimaging or thinking about it in a new way- Sometimes memories and thoughts are just so powerful and tangible that they bury you. I have learned to renounce the sin that was held in that memory or thought and declare out loud that it has no power over me anymore. There’s something powerful in the spoken word. When you can declare to that thing that you are forgiven and freed it begins to take a new shape in your head from something that was held over you and had power to condemn, to now nailed to the Cross. You can be free and can say so out loud! I have also had to make a new memory in an old place before, or even envision the cross around the memory.
  • Examples and suggestions- I have had quite a myriad of experiences ranging from normal people problems of selfishness and gossiping to alcoholism, sexual immorality and abuse recovery. I understand exactly how hard this is but I also understand the irreplaceable feeling of being free and victorious. When you need verses for your circumstances, look in your concordance or in a topical scripture guide online. Ask God to help you think how He thinks about that person or thing you went through. Even if being loving and forgiving is the furthest thing from your mind, ask Him to do the work of changing your heart and mind, He will do it. Read the Psalms until you find yours. I promise you, it’ll jump off the page at you when you find it. God breathed those words thousands of years ago with you and your hurt in mind. When I was a struggling alcoholic, thoughts of drinking again would threaten to overtake me, and I’d pray immediately for God to help me and remove the temptation, to help me change my mind. Each and every time God was faithful. When you are overcoming desires to gossip you need to think about that person like Christ does. He died for them and loves them as much as He loves you. When you have been abused and you are haunted by images and memories, you must stop them the second they come into to your head and pray immediately. There is no other way to find victory. Time will be a helper and aid towards you not feeling physical pain at the reminders, but the only way to not allow it to overtake you and gain the control over you is to grab it without hesitation and pray. Pray asking God to change the memory, ask Him to remove it or to lessen the pain, ask Him to give you a new image like the cross around it, or a verse to quote when it threatens you. Sometimes memories are the worst part of recovery and that’s why this exercise is so important. God didn’t put it in the Bible to offer a suggestion, He put it in there knowing we’d need to actively practice it daily in order to allow Him to transform us into the image of Christ. These are the ways I have done this and have found victory. I hope it can be helpful to someone else

~Dana

me-profileDana is saved by grace, grateful to the core. She is a mother of four teenagers and married to an incredible man for 19 years. Life up to this point has been an adventure for her with so many stories to tell. Her hope and prayer is that God can use her life’s story to reach others and make an impact for the Kingdom.
Guest-Writers

My God is Bigger, and I Can Prove It

UYM

Written By: Shannon Geurin

Sometimes I get overwhelmed when I look back at the way God has carried me over the years. He has carried me during my darkest times. Times when I couldn’t feel Him. Times when I questioned whether he even loved me.  Listen friends, if He can heal me and bring freedom to me that He can do the same for you! We serve a big God my friends, and if you need proof today,

I got yo proof.

my-god-is-bigger

I went horseback riding while I was at New Life Ranch last weekend. It was quite the experience. My horses name was Stickers. Stickers carried me down a trail that was winding, rocky and steep. As he carried me up that oh-so-steep path I was reminded of the way Jesus carries us.

I was reminded of how strong my Jesus is. 

I don’t know how that horse did it. It was rocky. I’m not talking pebbles folks. I’m talkin’ rocks. Like-  big, sharp edged-y type rocks. The kind of rocks that I, in no way, shape or form would be able to walk on without tough soled shoes on my feet; much less added weight to carry?!! Stickers had no problem. He carried me up the trail. Not gonna lie, it was scary. At any moment Stickers could have gotten tired and dropped me or even fell. But he didn’t. He didn’t because he’s strong. When we got to the top, the view was literally INCREDIBLE. I thought to myself; wow…it was so worth it. The journey was worth it.

Jesus carries us you guys.

God carries us in his arms. Psalm 68:1 #hecarriesus #heisSTRONG

When you don’t feel him anywhere around He is carrying you. He’s holding you. If you’ll stick with him…if you’ll keep your eyes focused on HIM… He will carry you. He will carry you the whole way. When it’s rocky, He’s there. When it’s steep, He’s there. And when you finally reach the top, the view will be amazing. You can’t see the view if you don’t go through the rocky, winding road!

If He can bring healing and restoration to my marriage after it was completely wrecked by infidelity, He can do the same for you!

If He can bring freedom and heal this heart that was full of shame and guilt, wondering if I’d ever be able to be the wife and mother to my family, He can do the same for you!

He took my daughters, held their hearts and whispered “oh how I love you” into their child-like ears.

He healed my daughter’s brain when she was still in my womb, so listen up mamma- He can do the same for you!

He took my friend’s heart, after it had been trampled into the ground and He has given her wholeness and healing. This dear friend and her children have been through the darkest of times anyone can imagine and now she is getting ready to marry a man who truly loves her. I’m telling you, God is BIGGER.

Those are just a few of the things my God has done for me and those I love.

GOD IS BIGGER.

 

But just in case you still don’t believe me- here’s some scripture to back it up.

  • Psalm 147:4 He counts the stars and calls them all by name.
  • Isaiah 40:12 Who else has held the oceans in his hand? Who has measured off the heavens with his fingers? Who else knows the weight of the earth or has weighed the mountains and hills on a scale?
  • Psalm 147:5 How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension!
  • Psalm 8:3-4 (one of my fav’s) When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers; the moon and the stars you set in place, what are mere mortals that you should think about them, human beings that you should care for them?

So- imagine that we’re having a cup of coffee together and listen to me and lean in.

God has you, do you hear me?

He did NOT bring you this far to let you sink!  NO.HE.DID.NOT.

He’s BIGGER than your fear!

He’s BIGGER than your doubt and unbelief!

He’s BIGGER than your mistake! SO.MUCH.BIGGER.

He’s BIGGER than your shame.

He’s BIGGER than your disease.

Oh, my dear friend…HE’S BIGGER.

Let God be big in your life so that the devil can be weak!

Let God be big in your life so that the devil can be weak! #GodisBIGGER

Good grief he made the ocean! Who does that?? {god} He knows how many hairs we have on our heads?! I mean…I have every confidence that my hubby loves the daylights out of me, every confidence in the world. But he doesn’t know how many hairs I have on my head?! He doesn’t love me that much???! But.God.Does.

God is huge. He’s infinite. Every part of life begins AND ends with Him. He is eternal.

That’s not the cool part, though. The cool part is that even though God is big…he stoops down ever so low tohear our hearts cry for help. There’s no one like Him. No one. Give your problems to Him. Draw upon His strength that He gives freely.

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Are you going through a season of doubt? Hurt? Shame? Oh my friend -cling to His promises in the verses I quoted above. He’s there with you right now!

xoshannon

For Shannon’s story, click on the image below…

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Guest-Writers

Before You Give That Advice…

UYM

Written By: Bethany McIlrath

I had a problem. I called up a friend and in the midst of our chatting I determined to act on the words of Proverbs 12:15: “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.” I asked for her advice.

But her words took me by surprise: “I don’t think I have wise counsel to offer about that.”

How often do we hear about asking for advice, seeking counsel, and being humble enough to listen to the wisdom of others? At the same time, we tend to learn little about giving advice or wise counsel. Few of us have been encouraged to be humble like my dear friend was, saying “I don’t have wisdom about that.”

God’s word is clear that we’re to exhort, challenge, encourage, and support one another.

Sometimes that means keeping what you consider “advice” to yourself.

So, before you share those words, ask yourself:

  1. Is This Fact or Opinion?

In 1 Timothy 6 and 2 Timothy 2 we are admonished to rightly handle the truth and to avoid “babbling” about false knowledge.

Some matters are open to interpretation. When you present your opinion, make it clear that you’re not stating facts. Be honest that your words and knowledge are your own and that you might be wrong. Seasoned speech leaves room for God to overrule.

  1. Is This About Me?

You know the verse: “why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own?” (Matthew 7:3). These words aren’t just about criticism. Before you give advice, figure out if the “wisdom” you share is borne out of hypocrisy or a part of you projecting your own issues onto someone else.

  1. Am I Qualified to Give This Advice?

Back to 1 Timothy (a letter rich in wisdom about words, advice, and relationships!). The first chapter alone mentions “speculation rather than stewardship,” “vain discussion,” and failing to understand “either what they are saying or the things about which they make confident assertions.”

Would any advice you have to offer fall under one of those categories? If so, point to the Word of God or to those with more experience in the matter.

  1. Is This Worthwhile?

If your advice is vague, non-committal, or a lot like thinking out loud, ask yourself if you might be speaking empty words (Matthew 12:36). There may be other words, apart from advice, that would be more meaningful. Try sharing a verse, a prayer, or speaking as a friend instead of as a counsellor.

~Bethany

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A learner at heart, Bethany McIlrath believes that listening to the Lord’s Word and being attentive to all that He teaches her through daily life is a priceless blessing. Eager to share about her Savior, you can find Bethany’s writing on her blog: Firstandsecondblog.wordpress.com. She would love to connect with you on Twitter or Facebook as well.  

 

Guest-Writers, {Faith}

{Faith} What, Not Why

UYM

Written By: Tricia Underwood

“Mom, why do I have to go through this?”, my daughter asked me, while her face was covered in tears, but I had heard this question just as many times from my son as well over the last two years.

I had run out of “textbook” answers.

To be honest, I had asked God the same thing myself.

Why did either of them have to suffer the things they’ve had to over the last couple of years? Why have I had to go through the pain that has left me a completely different person than I used to be just a short two years ago? Why did my husband have a form of cancer and now even though thankfully (oh, so thankfully) he is cancer-free, he still fights another chronic sickness in and of itself, that I would argue is equally as debilitating, called anxiety caused by stress and worry?

Why does this issue of sickness seem to affect every single one of the members of our household, including our fur-babies (our pets!)? As crazy as it sounds, even our pets have had some major health issues over the last two years, including our cat having to go on daily medication in order to live and our dog who is currently battling cancer at a young age.

It seems that our unwellness seems to cycle from being being badly sick, to being baseline unwell (our new “normal”)… always waiting for the next BIG thing to come along and take one of us down again. It’s like there is a stronghold over our family right now, despite a LOT of prayer and fasting.

So when my own children (twins, who are 12 years old) ask me WHY~ WHY are they in pain, WHY does our functional practitioner prescribe a certain diet that has taken away their previously favorite foods, WHY do they have to take so many supplements or drink herbal teas, WHY is it that despite all this they STILL have health problems~ WHY is it that I can’t give them an answer that I feel at peace with? It’s easy for me to want to find an answer by blaming things the research tells me may have caused all of our health issues, sure. Yet, somehow I feel their question deserves a much deeper answer. As if just knowing the scientific answers aren’t (and would never be) enough.

We may never be satisfied with the hard “why” questions in life, even if we are given the logical answers, without knowing the full reason of WHY God let us go through this season in our life to begin with.

A local pastor that I admire and respect, Pastor Steven Furtick, said this:

“What would happen if you stopped asking, ‘God, WHY am I going through this?’ and started asking, ‘God, WHAT are you preparing me for?’”

Wow~ do you see the difference in the two questions?! The first focuses on ME. Woe is me… I am suffering… WHY am I the one going through all this?!

The second question focuses on God and asks Him to provide the answer, as only He can, to WHAT is His PURPOSE behind what He is doing through this trial or hardship… what is He preparing you for?

Talk about game-changer!!

I am all about perspective changes in my life, and this was certainly one of them!! This was like a Peter walking on water towards Jesus moment for me.

When Peter took his eyes off Jesus and onto the storm, he began to sink~ like my family and I are feeling every.single.day. Each time a new “wave” of sickness or physical injury “attacks” us, to be honest, we haven’t been focusing on Jesus really. Sure, we pray and ask for His healing, but IN THE STORM, while the waves are crashing in on us, we are giving too much focus to the storm itself! We need to focus on Him and Him alone.

In doing that, I love how Pastor Furtick guides us to ask the Lord what He is preparing us for through these waves of hardship. I have never once asked the Lord to show me this, and I wonder what have I missed in the past two years because I have failed to do so.

One of the ways I’ve often answered my daughter as to the “why” she has had to endure what she has, is that perhaps God will use her to be a comfort to someone else who goes through a similar situation, perhaps even a child one day, since now she knows what it’s like to face this at such a young age.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NLT)
All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

But again, I’ve focused more on the future than in asking God to show us what He would like for us to do NOW~ how He wants to use us NOW.

My husband and I have oftentimes thought of ourselves, and this season in our lives of sickness in our family, as the Job Season (Job as in the person in the Bible, as we are praying and trusting this is just a season). I’ve been clinging to this passage for hope~

Job 42:1-5 (ESV) 
Then Job answered the Lord and said: “I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. ‘Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?’ Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know. ‘Hear, and I will speak; I will question you, and you make it known to me.’ I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you

I’m so hopeful that in changing my perspective to, “Lord, please show each of us, make known to us, what you are preparing us for through these painful and hard times,” rather than a “WHY, God, why” prayer, that the Lord will begin to show Himself, His ways, and His plans for each of our lives to each one of us.

2 Corinthians 4:17 (AMP)
For our momentary, light distress [this passing trouble] is producing for us an eternal weight of glory [a fullness] beyond all measure [surpassing all comparisons, a transcendent splendour and an endless blessedness]!

Romans 8:18 (AMP)
For I consider [from the standpoint of faith] that the sufferings of the present life are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is about to be revealed to us and in us!

Until Next Time,
Tricia

 

Guest-Writers

Releasing With Confidence

UYM

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Written By: Dana Hoebeke

One of the blessings we get as parents is hearing a good report about your child from someone outside the family. A teacher praising their character or one of your friends commenting on their politeness while your child visited their home. We start to feel like maybe we are doing something right, our children are displaying character that we are trying so hard to teach at home. The kind of character that points to the proof of their relationship with Christ. Scripture calls it fruit.

I am the mother of four teens, one is graduated. It warms my heart so much for someone to stop me in the hallway at church to let me know what a gem one of my kids are. It’s like a win for the God-centered parenting team!

I think all of us realize that consistency with kids is the key to breeding good character. However, consistency in doing what? How do we get our kids to choose to do what is right when we aren’t there, giving them a “look”, or actually telling them what to do?

The whole point of parenting is to one day release independent young adults. Ones that are capable of making choices without us and we hope and pray that they rely on God for their guidance to those right choices.

No step program, advice from a professional, or practiced secular behavior is the answer.

There is really only one answer. I am fully confident in this answer because I believe God, I believe what He says in His Word is true, and I believe He is faithful and true to fulfill what He promises in scripture.

The answer is your children have to love Jesus.

John 14:23 Jesus answered, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word. My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him.

It sounds too simple right? Well let me tell you, it is simple. The key is consistency and open honesty with your kids as you are raising them. They have to know you are human and make mistakes too. Don’t forget your mistakes and lessons you’ve personally learned are not just for you. They always have a higher purpose. Your mess being turned into His Message is meant to be shared!

What we are really saying as Christian parents when we want our kids to choose to do right when we are not there is that we want them to follow Jesus, to not just obey us but ultimately obey Him.

Here are some pointed ways to help your children love Jesus, so they in turn desire to obey Him and live as a light in the dark world.

 

  • 1 John 5:14-15 says “Now this is the confidence we have before Him; whenever we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears whatever we ask, we know that we have what we have asked Him for.” We don’t have the ability to love God. He places the ability to love supernaturally within us. We have to teach our children to ask Him to create the love for Him that drives the desire to obey Him.
  • James 4:17 “So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin” and James 1:22 “But be doers of the word and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.” We have to call it clearly what it is when obedience hasn’t happened. It is sin. Sin that needs to be confessed and repented from. Children are never too young to explain that wrongdoing, rebelling against God’s word, is sin. Keeping short accounts and a right relationship with God will ensure His Holy Spirit has free reign to sanctify them through and through, continually growing that love for Christ that enables the desire to obey.
  • James 4:7 “Therefore, submit to God. But resist the Devil, and he will flee from you.” This is a small and very serious verse for them to understand. All Christ-like living begins with submitting or surrendering your will to God’s will. If you hold on tight to your will, your “want to”, and your own plans for life you’ll never be able to experience all the God has planned for you. Ephesians 2:10 says “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” Before your children (or you for that matter) were even formed, God had their days planned out, with blessings and an amazing future that includes doing good works for the Kingdom! We need to teach our children that if they aren’t obeying God, seeking His face, reading His Word and praying, that we might not be in the right position to receive all that He has for us! I can’t imagine how many intended, ordained blessings I missed out on because I was following my desires instead of Christ’s.
  • Colossians 3:17 “And whatsoever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.” Our kids need to grasp that each and every little thing they do can be done to God’s glory or not. There really isn’t an in between on this one. You either are or you’re not. Doing house chores with joy and helpful attitudes, doing school work with diligence, being kind to siblings and choosing not to fight, choosing to obey parents on the first time, choosing to not mouth back. All of those things are completely within their power to do because it begins with a choice. Choosing Jesus over self.
  • Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” And Deuteronomy 11:19 “Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” The chapter of Deut. 11 is God speaking, telling the Israelites that they’d better teach their children about all the Lord had done for them because they were not present during their deliverance. The younger generation did not experience the deliverance from the bondage of Egypt, the splitting open of the immeasurable obstacle of the Red Sea so they could walk right through it, the visible manifestation of the Sovereign God in the cloud by day and pillar of fire by night, the manna falling from the sky, the water from a rock and so many other miracles. Those children needed to know their amazing God, the Great I AM, and the only way they were going to hear about it all was from their parents. That’s us! We have to diligently, consistently teach our children who God is and who they are in Christ. They are joint-heirs with Him to the treasure of being God’s Child! All the promises and glorious riches of our gracious Father are theirs!

When you have children that are not exhibiting Christ-like behaviour, remember your benchmark is not that they obey you, follow you or mimic any other person….their benchmark is the Lord Jesus Christ. We are not called to follow Christians, we are called to follow Christ. The desire to follow and obey Him is hidden in having love for Him. If we love Him, we will obey Him.

3 John 1:4 I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.

~Dana

me-profileDana is saved by grace, grateful to the core. She is a mother of four teenagers and married to an incredible man for 19 years. Life up to this point has been an adventure for her with so many stories to tell. Her hope and prayer is that God can use her life’s story to reach others and make an impact for the Kingdom.