Written By: Amie Comber
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” –Hebrews 11:1
My feet pounded the pavement. My breaths were steady as I inhaled and exhaled the crisp morning air to the beat of my steps. I was running. Shivering from the cold, I listened to the other runners around me; to the chatter, and the laughter. Everything was in motion: the people, the scenery, and the water on the lake. It felt in that moment that the only thing that was steady was my mind, and my determination to hit the finish line.
What no one else knew on that half marathon race morning was that I was injured. I had visited the Doctor a few weeks prior to see if I still had hope of running this race I had prepared months for. I had faith I could do it. I was put on heavy pain medicine, and he told me I could go for it. So there I was, pushing away the doubt, and having faith in the training I had had before the injury to propel me to the finish line 13.1 miles later. I had faith in the medicine. I had faith in my determination. I also told God at the start of the race that I had faith in His plan, and that I surrendered the outcome to Him.
Four miles in I stopped. Knee throbbing, heart pounding, and spirits down to my shoes, I watched through downcast eyes, as the other runners sprint past me. “I’ll be fine in a moment,” I said to myself. My head kept telling me to walk it off. So I walked. I walked for a mile, and another mile, and yet another one. I was at mile 8 out of 13.1 when I started to panic. My time was running out, I was all alone, and I wouldn’t be able to finish. The other runners had long since passed me up, and there I was, a girl who looked like there was nothing wrong with her, slightly limping, and trying to hide the fact from the pedestrians walking faster than me on the trail, that I was a part of a big race that day. It was in that moment that I decided God wanted to talk to me about something. I felt hurt. I had done everything I could do to train. My training told me I was ready, my doctor told me I was ready, and my heart told me I could do it. I felt like I had been cheated out of something. God and I talked a lot along that wooded trail. We talked until the last person passed me. What started as grumbling and complaining, turned into a beautiful conversation as the miles passed and my heart softened and let go, once again, of my will, and put my faith back into HIS.
Just because I have faith that something will happen doesn’t mean it will. This was not a demonstration about how much “faith I had,” but more a surrendering of my will and plans to the plans of God. I had faith in a lot that morning, and everything fell through. I also had faith that God’s plan would be best for me, and it was. It was nothing like I had planned, and it hurt so much going through it, but through that small test I see the world differently, and like to think that my talk with God grew me in ways that wouldn’t have happened if I had been able to run the entirety of the race. God wants me to have faith in Him: in His love for me, His plan for my life, and His truth. I can choose to put my faith into whatever I’d like, but when I build my faith upon the Rock it will stand.
I walked until mile 10. God provided a helper along the race that offered to give me a lift, and I humbly limped through the finish line. I came away with a medal, but what I truly walked away from that race with was a heart filled with much more humility, some precious moments spent alone with God, and a better understanding of His will and faith. HIS plan is always best, sweet girl. Put your faith in HIS plans, not your own. Sometimes you have to have those long talks alone with God along a wooded trail to get to where He truly wants you to be.
Until next time,