Written By: Tracey Pierce
“Where is your favourite place in the world?” Those were the words that came across the airwaves to me and it took not a second for my mind to find the answer. My most favourite place in all the world is not anywhere that you will find on a map or globe but it is a place that is stamped indelibly on my heart. It is the most comforting, welcoming, secure place on the planet and it is mine alone. That place is under the arm (preferably, the right arm!) of my husband, Tim. Nowhere else can make me feel more relaxed, loved, or “at home”. It is – he is – my safe place.
And, you know, it has always been that way. From the time that we began dating (many, many…many years ago!), Tim has always been my ‘safe place’. His kindness, gentleness, and patience have been a haven for my soul.
Unfortunately, the same cannot be said about who I was for him. From its roots in deep-seated insecurity, woundedness, and pain, I often spewed out anger at Tim. All of the ‘ugly’ inside of me found, in Tim, a sanctuary – a place to vent, to release some of the pent-up pressure without fear of rejection or reciprocated anger.
As I think back now on those many years that Tim exemplified Jesus to me – taking what he did not deserve and loving me in return – I shake my head in wonder. I wonder how he endured, how he remained faithful, and how he ever continued to love me. Now, I do realize that things were not always bad all of the time, but when a husband finds himself dreading going home from work each day because he is not sure what kind of mood he will find his wife in, something has to change.
And I did desire change; I truly did. I was not happy with who I often was for Tim. But, no matter how much I tried, how many anger workbooks I bought, or how many anger management seminars I attended, nothing seemed to change – at least, not for very long. I could not, in my own efforts, overcome my anger issues.
Stormie Omartian, in her book The Power of a Praying Wife (which I highly recommend to every wife regardless of the status of your marriage – struggling, ‘so-so’, or strong), says, “One of the greatest gifts you can give your husband is your own wholeness.” Books and seminars can help but only Jehovah-rapha, the Lord that heals, could bring the wholeness, healing, and restoration that I needed deep within.
That healing journey has been long but truly miraculous. It began the day I spoke aloud to the Lord the words that verbalized forgiveness for those things that had been done or not done, said or not said that had caused me such pain.
But now, my reward for doing that hard thing is great. My Tim would tell you himself that, as spoken of in Proverbs 31, he has found a virtuous wife whose worth is far above rubies; that his heart safely trusts me; so he will have no lack of gain; that now I do him good and not evil all the days of my life. These days we both have a safe place that is our most favourite place in all the world. Thank You, God.
Tracey Pierce is a blessed-beyond-measure daughter of the King who resides in Kingston, Ontario, with her “safe place” and husband, Tim, and their three amazing teenagers. Tracey’s desire and calling are to encourage and assist women of God to become all that their Father has created them to be.